Joke #4366

Good: Your daughter has got a new job. Bad: As a call girl. Ugly: Your co-workers are her best clients. Very ugly: She makes more money than you.
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has 50.20 % from 70 votes. More jokes about: sex

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Holy mother, full of grace Bless my boyfriend's gorgeous face Bless his hair that tends to curl Keep him safe from all the girls Bless his arms that are so strong Keep his hands where they belong Bless his dick, the one i sucked Bless the bed, in which we fucked And if my Mom happened to walk in Bless the shit I'd be in.
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Q. What do gay kids get for Christmas? A. Erection Sets.
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has 35.50 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: sex
A man has came over to his wife in a request. She tells him to tie her to a bed and do whatever he wants. 3 hours later he is fucking hookers and watching football and porn with friend.
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has 64.34 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, men, sex, wife
Why pay $5 at Subway when you can get this footlong for free?
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has 63.26 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: dirty, flirt, food, money, sex
A man who recently had a sex-change operation was talking to his former buddies at work about the operation. "Was it painful?" someone asked. "Well,"she said. "There was one part that was extremely painful." "I bet I know what part was so painful," someone else said. "I bet it was when they cut off your balls," they said. "No," she said. "I was heavily sedated and didn't feel a thing." "Then it must have been when they cut off your pecker," another person offered. "No," she said. "I was sedated then too, and didn't feel anything." "Then what part of the operation was so painful?" They wanted to know. "Well," she said. "After they were done cutting, they stuck a straw in my ear and sucked out half of my brains."
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has 39.24 % from 132 votes. More jokes about: doctor, sex, work
The vicar never entertained lewd thoughts – they always entertained him.
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has 42.19 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: sex
Two old friends are having coffee when the first woman says, "I hear that you’ve been telling people that I’m ugly!" "Oh NO! I’ve just been saying that your new hairdo makes you look less attractive." "I also heard that you’ve been calling me fat?" "Oh NO! I just said that the way you wear those stripes makes you look larger than you really are." "I’ve also heard that you’re saying that my husband has a wart on his dick!" "Oh NO! I only said that it feels like he has a wart on his dick!"
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has 70.37 % from 111 votes. More jokes about: fat, husband, sex, ugly, women
16 and Pregnant. 15 and Fucking. 14 and Sucking. 13 and Licking. 12 and Fingering. 11 and Touching. 9 and Kissing. 8 and Wondering. Welcome To Our Fucked Up Generation...
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has 77.52 % from 1737 votes. More jokes about: age, sex
The woman was in bed with her lover and had just told him how stupid her Irish husband was when the door was thrown open and there stood her husband. He glared at her lover and bellowed, "What are you doing?" "There," said the wife, "didn’t I tell you he was stupid?"
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has 66.27 % from 90 votes. More jokes about: husband, sex, stupid, women
Wife and husband have bought condoms with different flavours. Darling, I will turn off the light, put one on and you guess the flavour. As soon as he turns off the light, she takes it in the mouth and says: Gorgonzola! Wait, it is not on yet.
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has 47.50 % from 89 votes. More jokes about: sex