Most babies born today are very young.
"Madam, your son just called me an ugly swine!" The mother apologizes shamefacedly, "I'm so sorry, I must have told him like a thousand times it is wrong to judge people just from how they look..."
John: How old are you? Peter: Hmmm..I'm 7 John: You know what, when I was your age, I was also 7.
A man and wife were making love. When thay saw there 8 year old son at the door crying the dad started laughing and the boy ran away. Mom said "You better fix this now." The dad couldn't find the boy anywhere unwell he hurd a loud noise conning from grandma's room so he opened up the door and there was the boy putting his "wood" to grandma. The dad screamed "What the fuck." The boy said "It aims so funny when it's your mom is it."
"Mommy, mommy, I found daddy!" "How often do I have to tell you not to dig around in the garden!"
On a men's bathroom wall, someone had hastily scrawled, "I slept with your mother." Underneath it, another person had written, "Go home dad, you're drunk."
One day Adam and his parents were at the mall. Adams mum gave him a $5 note and sent him on his way. He got a bag of chips and a drink. He went outside and his mum and dad weren't there.
Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A: We have to stick together.
One day this little girl’s dad came home and she runs up to him. “Daddy, the cat died today!” “Well, darling,” said the dad. “That’s just something that happens.” “But why are his arms and legs up in the air?” “Well, darling, that’s just something they do.” She takes the death fairly well and doesn’t mention it until a few days later. When the dad comes home, she runs up to him. “Daddy, Daddy, Mommy almost died today!” “What are you talking about?” “I came downstairs and I heard her screaming ’Oh Jesus, take me, take me!’ And she had her arms and legs up in the air and if it hadn’t been for the mailman trying to revive her she would have died.”
Did you hear about the new Exorcist Movie? They got the Devil to come in to take the Priest out of the child.
Q: What did the adding machine say to the cashier? A: You can count on me.