Joke #4681

The cost of living is the difference between your net income and your gross habits!
Vote: has 34.78 % from 6 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: money

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Q: Why did the Asian cross the road? A: Because he had no car!
Vote: has 43.20 % from 72 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: asian, car, money, racist
I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.
Vote: has 40.95 % from 7 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: money
A mugger stops a guy on the street at gunpoint. "Give me all your money", he says. The muggee isindignant. "You can't do this," he yells. "I'm anIRS agent." "In that case," says the mugger, "give me all MY money."
Vote: has 75.00 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: accountant, money, work
When I told the doctor about my loss of memory, he made me pay in advance.
Vote: has 80.46 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: doctor, memory, money
All I ask for is the opportunity to prove that money doesn’t buy happiness...All most people want is a chance to prove money can’t make them happy.
Vote: has 40.95 % from 7 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: money
He was so mean he had the house sound-proofed so the children wouldn’t be able to hear the ice cream van.
Vote: has 26.98 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: money
If money dosnt grow on trees why do banks have branches?
Vote: has 63.07 % from 44 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: money
A man is sitting in a bar when a beautiful woman walks up and whispers in his ear, “I'll do anything you want for 50 bucks.” He puts his drink down and starts going through his pockets. He pulls out a ten, two five's, a twenty and ten ones. He thrusts the wadded up money into the woman's hand and says, "Here...paint my house.”
Vote: has 66.77 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, bar, money, women
Q: What do the Jews hate most about the Holocaust? A: The cost.
Vote: has 61.50 % from 42 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, jewish, money
Three friends -- two straight guys and a gay guy -- and their significant others were on a cruise. A tidal wave came up and swamped the ship; they all drowned, and next thing you know, they're standing before St. Peter. First came one of the straight guys and his wife. St. Peter shook his head sadly. "I can't let you in. You loved money too much. You loved it so much, you even married a woman named Penny." Then came the second straight guy. "Sorry, can't let you in, either. You loved food too much. You loved to eat so much, you even married a woman named Candy!" The gay guy turned to his boyfriend and whispered nervously, "It doesn't look good, Dick."
Vote: has 81.72 % from 1873 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, gay, love, marriage, money