Q: What's the worst thing you're likely to find in the school cafeteria?
A: The Food! 
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The pretty teacher was concerned with one of her eleven-year-old students.
Taking him aside after class one day, she asked, "George, why has your school work been so poor lately?"
"I’m in love," the boy replied.
Holding back an urge to smile, she asked, "With whom?"
"With you," he said.
"But George," she said gently, "don’t you see how silly that is? It’s true that I would like a husband of my own someday. But I don’t want a child."
"Oh, don’t worry," the boy said reassuringly, "I’ll use a rubber."
You know your f*cked when the Asian says, "shit", during the test.
Why don’t some teachers like to break wind in public?
Because they’re private tooters.
She is so blonde, she studied for a blood test.
Why did the teacher jump into the lake?
Because she wanted to test the waters!
They wanted something long and hard.....
I gave them MY HOMEWORK!
Teacher: "Sam, what is the outside of a tree called?"
Sam: "I don't know."
Teacher: "Bark, Sam, bark."
Sam: "Bow, wow, wow!"
When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay:
"What is courage?" He received an A+ for turning in a blank page with only his name at the top.
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Q: Why can't a blonde count to 70?
A: Because 69's a mouthful.
Little Johnny's father farted.
The son asked his father: "What was that?"
His father said: "My sweet that is 'north wind'"
When he went to school the teacher asked the class: "Who knows the direction of the north wind?
Little Johnny shouted: "My daddy's ass!"
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