Q: What vegetables to librarians like? A: Quiet peas.
English Class Teacher: "One day we will be corruption free. Which tense is it?" Student: "Future impossible tense."
Q: What comes before 8? A: My school bus usually.
Johnny's father: "Let me see your report card." Johnny: "I don't have it." Johnny's father: "Why not?" Johnny: My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."
The following conversation took place in school. Teacher: "So we are all descended from Adam and Eve." Young kid: "My dad says we came from apes." Teacher: "That's probably true for your family Abdul."
Q. What's the king of the pencil case? A. The ruler.
Son: I can't go to school today. Father: Why not? Son: I don't feel so well. Father: Where does it hurt? Son: In school.
What kind of food do maths teachers eat? Square meals!
Teacher:Maria please point to America on the map. Maria:This is it. Teacher:Well done. Now class, who found America? Class:Maria did.
After Sunday school, the teacher released the kids to go to church and reminded them, "You all know to be very nice and quiet in the church. And why is that?" Little Johnny offers, "Miss, it's so we wouldn't wake all those people sleeping."
I wish my grades would smoke weed too so we could both get higher.