Joke #4988

Mother: What did you learn in school today Son: How to write. Mother: What did you write? Son: I don't know, they haven't taught us how to read yet!
Vote: has 81.39 % from 337 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: school

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

The teacher said to Danny: "Why are you in the floor?" Danny said: "Because you said to do this Math problem without Tables."
Vote: has 74.97 % from 91 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: school
Q: What's the worst thing you're likely to find in the school cafeteria? A: The Food!
Vote: has 42.25 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: school
Chuck Norris got a perfect SAT score by just putting his name on the paper...
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, school
Q: What is the difference between an ISIS boot camp and a local school? A: How should I know? I just fly the drones.
Vote: has 75.97 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: air force, school, terrorist, war
Teacher: “Johnny, what is the outside of a tree called?” Johnny: “I don’t know.” Teacher: “Bark, Johnny, bark.” Johnny: “Bow, wow, wow!”
Vote: has 76.54 % from 190 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: school
A schoolteacher was arrested today at Gatwick Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule and a calculator. At a morning press conference, the Home Secretary said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the police with carrying weapons of maths instruction.
Vote: has 49.79 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: school
Three men were using the urinals in a public restroom in DC. The first man finished relieving himself, zipped up, strolled to the sinks and proceeded to wash his hands, using plenty of soap and water and doing a splendidly thorough job. As he was drying his hands (with lots of paper towels), he loftily announced to no one in particular "At Harvard, I learned to be clean and sanitary."  The second gent zipped up, marched briskly to the sinks, and scrubbed his hands with much less soap and water than the first man, doing a splendidly thorough job nonetheless. As he was drying his hands (with only one paper towel), he severely announced to no one in particular, "At Yale, I learned to be clean and sanitary, but I ALSO learned to be thrifty and environmentally conscious."  The third man finished relieving himself, zipped up, and ambled past the sinks to the door, muttering to himself, "In kindergarten, I learned not to piss on my hands."
Vote: has 79.21 % from 76 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: school
Teacher: Ramu, give me a sentence starting with " I ". Ramu: I is... Teacher: No, Ramu. Always say, "I am." Ramu: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
Vote: has 35.28 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: school
An announcement came over the intercom for the college students: "Will the students who are parked on the wrong side of the Parking area please move their cars." Twenty minutes later there was another announcement: "Will the three hundred students who went to move fourteen cars return to class."
Vote: has 31.97 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: school
The visiting Bible school supervisor asks little Johnny during Bible class, "Who broke down the walls of Jericho?" Little Johnny replies, "I dunno, but it wasn't me!" The supervisor, taken aback by Johnny's lack of basic Bible knowledge goes to the school principal and relates the whole incident. The principal replies, "I know Little Johnny as well as his whole family very well and can vouch for them; if Little Johnny said that he did not do it, then I, as principal is satisfied that it is the truth." Even more appalled, the inspector goes to the regional Head of Education and relates the whole story... After listening he replies: "I can't see why you are making such a big issue out of this; just get three quotes and fix the damned wall!"
Vote: has 78.73 % from 205 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: bible, little Johnny, religious, school