Mother: What did you learn in school today Son: How to write. Mother: What did you write? Son: I don't know, they haven't taught us how to read yet!
There are three 6th grade girls: a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. Which one has the biggest tits? The blonde....she's 18.
Q: What comes before 8? A: My school bus usually.
A little girl took her report card home and showed it to mom. The mother was very disappointed by all the very low grades. "Well look on the bright side" said the child, "you know for sure I don't cheat."
Jacob: Why was the teacher wearing sunglasses to school? Leonard: Why? Jacob: She had bright students!
Teacher: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? Student: A teacher!
"Haven't I seen your face before?" a judge demanded, looking down at the defendant. "You have, Your Honor," the man answered hopefully. "I gave your son violin lessons last winter." "Ah, yes," recalled the judge. "Twenty years!"
A mom calls out to her son "Harry! Wake up! You'll be late for school." The son replies, "Mom I don't want to go to school! The teachers and students hate me! Give me one reason I should go!" The mom says back, "You should go because you're the principal!"
Father to son after exam: "Let me see your report card." Son: "My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."
Teacher: “How can you prove the earth is round?” Boy: “I can’t. Besides, I never said it was.”
Stevie: Hey, Mom, I got a hundred in school today! Mom: That’s great. What in? Stevie: A 40 in Reading and a 60 in Spelling.