Joke #5425

There was a boy playing in the farm field when his mom called him in for breakfast. On his way in he kicked a cow, pig, and a chicken. So when he gets to the table he sees a dry bowl of cereal. "What's the deal?" he asks. His mom says "You kicked the cow so no milk for you, you kicked the pig so no bacon for you, and you kicked the chicken so no eggs for you." Then his father walks into the kitchen and accidentally kicked the cat. The the boy says "Do you want me to tell him or should you?"
Vote: has 63.00 % from 24 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: kids

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Mrs Laura a kindergarten teacher asked her class "what things we can eat?" "Bread" "Yes" "Hamburger" "Ok" A five years girl answered "Light", "Omg" shouted the teacher, "how can light be eaten?" "Last night I heared mom whispering to dad 'turn the light off and put it in my mouth'".
Vote: has 77.66 % from 92 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, dirty, food, kids, sex
What color is a burp? It's burple!
Vote: has 17.65 % from 58 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: kids
One weekend, the husband is in the bathroom shaving when the kid he hired to mow his lawn, a local kid named Bubba, comes in to pee. The husband slyly looks over and is shocked at how immensely endowed Bubba is. He can't help himself, and asks Bubba what his secret is. "Well," says Bubba, "every night before I climb into bed with a girl, I whack my penis on the bedpost three times. It works, and it sure impresses the girls!" The husband was excited at this easy suggestion and decided to try it that very night. So before climbing into bed with his wife, he took out his penis and whacked it three times on the bedpost. His wife, half-asleep, said, "Bubba? Is that you?"
Vote: has 56.47 % from 169 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: husband, kids, marriage, sex
Happy Father's Day to the only person on the planet still willing to employ me.
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Fathers day, kids, work
A little boy was taken to the dentist. It was discovered that he had a cavity that would have to be filled. "Now, young man," asked the dentist, "what kind of filling would you like for that tooth?" "Chocolate, please," replied the youngster.
Vote: has 63.66 % from 28 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: chocolate, dentist, kids
Son: "Daddy; why some of your hairs have turned white?" Father: "Every lie told by you makes one of my hairs white." Son: "Oh now I understood why all grandfathers' hairs are white."
Vote: has 85.06 % from 272 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, communication, dad, family, kids
Billy, learned at school that everybody has secrets. So, he decided to take advantage of it. One day, as he came home from school, he went in front of his mother and told her: "Mommy, mommy! I know everything!" His mom, obviously scared to death: "Here, take a 100 euros and say NOTHING to your father about it, okay?" "Okay mommy!" says Billy and leaves the room with a big smile on his face. When his dad came from work, he did the same to him as well: "Daddy, daddy! I found out everything!" Numb, his father puts his hand on his pocket: "Here, take a 100 euros and say NOTHING to your mother, okay?" "Okay!" says Billy with a bigger smile on his face. The next morning, on his way to school, he sees the Postman. He thought he could try it to him too: "Mr. Focker, I know everything!" The Postman, the minute he heard it, fell on his knees and wide opened his arms: "Then, come... Come closer... My son!"
Vote: has 81.83 % from 101 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dad, death, kids, money, school
He used to be a bottle baby, but when he reached the age of ten he pushed the cork out and escaped.
Vote: has 10.55 % from 24 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: kids
Chuck Norris had six kids, they were called SEAL TEAM 6.
Vote: has 40.09 % from 27 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, kids, military
Q: What game did the dentist play when she was a child? A: Caps and robbers
Vote: has 54.26 % from 13 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dentist, game, kids