After working together for a while, Frank and Jane's office romance blossomed and they really developed the hots for each other.
One day,they seize the opportunity to sneak into a supply closet to consummate their lust.
Frank finds Jane very tight and difficult to enter, but finally succeeds.
When they are finished, Frank says to her, "If I had known you were a virgin, I would have taken more time!"
To which Jane replies, "If I'd known you had more time, I would have taken off my pantyhose!"
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What has a slice of burnt toast and a pregnant girlfriend got in common?
In both cases you wish you took it out a few seconds earlier.
Q: Why does Michael Jackson like twenty five-year-olds?
A: Because there are twenty of them!
Q: What's long and hard and full of semen?
A: A submarine.
Friend: Dude, I can't stop dreaming about my crush.
Me: Well imagine this... You're home alone, and your crush comes over to visit.
Friend: Ok I can see it...
Me: She walks into your room and you're just sitting there.
Friend: Uh-huh.. I'm likin' this.
Me: Ok. So she walks in front of you, takes her pants off.
She's not wearing any underwear.. And then she sits on you.
Friend: Oh-ho-hoo.. Whatta' naughty girl.
Me: Yeah, ok. Don't get dirty on me. So she's sitting on you.
And then... she starting shitting in you. Right then and there, you find out you're a toilet.
Friend: I hate you...
Vote:
What's the difference between a dead baby and a table?
You can't fuck a table.
Vote:
A son is discussing funeral arrangements with his dying mother.
‘Would you like to be buried or cremated?’ asks the son.
The mother replies, ‘I don’t know.
Surprise me.’
What is the difference between mayonnaise and semen?
Mayonnaise doesn't shoot down your throat at 40 miles per hour.
Q: Why do vegetarians give good head?
A: Beause they're used to eating nuts.
What is the difference between a joystick and a man's d**k?
A joystick does its job.