Six mates were seated at the bar, each trying to impress one another with the size of their dicks.
The bragging went on for almost an hour, and the bartender got tired of hearing about cocks, so he said, "Let's put an end to all this crap and find out who's lying and who isn't. Each of you whip out your dong and lay it on the bar."
All six of them did.
Just at that moment a faggot walked into the bar, and the bartender asked him if he wanted a drink.
The queer looked down the bar, and in a lisping voice, he said, "No thanks, I'll just have some of the buffet."
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Did you hear about the homosexual letter?
Only came in male boxes.
Three gay men died, and were going to be cremated.
Their lovers happened to be at the funeral home at the same time, and were discussing what they planned to do with the ashes.
The first man said, "My Ryan loved to fly, so I'm going up in a plane and scatter his ashes in the sky."
The second man said, "My Ross was a good fisherman, so I'm going to scatter his ashes in our favorite lake."
The third man said, "My Jack was such a good lover, I think I'm going to dump his ashes in a pot of chili, so he can tear my ass up just one more time."
Two gay men decide to have a baby.
They mix their sperm and have a surrogate mother artificially inseminated.
When the baby is born, they rush to the hospital.
Two dozen babies are in the ward, 23 of which are crying and screaming.
One, over in the corner, is smiling serenely.
A nurse comes by, and to the men's delight, she points out the happy child as theirs.
''Isn't it wonderful?''
Brad exclaims.
''All these unhappy children, and ours is so happy.''
''He's happy now," says the nurse.
"But just wait until we take the pacifier out of his ass.''
How can you make a gay man scream twice?
Fudge him real hard. Then wipe your dick off on his curtains.
Q: Which is better, being born black or gay?
A: Black, because you don't have to tell your parents.
Vote:
A US Army soldier sat in a bar with his head in his hands having just finished his first day of Airborne training.
His buddy sat down on the stool next to him and asked him what was the matter.
"I just finished my first day in Airborne training and it didn't go too well", he sighed.
"What happened?", his buddy asked.
"Well, we got over the jump zone, the green light came on and we all hooked up to the jump line.
We shuffled to the door and when it was my turn, I just froze. I couldn't jump."
"What happened then?", his buddy asked, concerned.
"Well the jump sargeant started yelling at me.
He said, Boy, if you don't jump right now, I'm going to shove my fist up your ass!"
"Did you jump?"
"Well, a little at first."
Q: Why can't gays drive faster than 68mph?
A: Because at 69 they blow a rod.
Q: How can you tell if you're in a gay church?
A: Only half the congregation is kneeling.
Vote:
What do you call it when someone farts in a Gay Bar?
Mating call
A nun gets on a bus thats empty except for the driver.
She says "I'm going to die soon but I want to have sex before I die. Problem is I must remain a virgin so it has to be to ass. I can't commit adultery, so the man must be single.Can you fulfill my wish?"
"Yes" says the bus driver and fulfills her wish.
Feeling guilty he says "I'm sorry I lied, I'm married with 3 kids."
"Thats ok" replied the nun "I lied too."
"My name is Kevin and Im going to a fancy dress party."