One day a tiny Apache indian child walked into Big Chief Sitting Bull's Teepee.
"Sitting Bull," He asked,
"Why does every man in our tribe have such long, complicated names?"
"Well," says Sitting Bull,
"Its simple.Whenever a baby in this tribe is born, His Father wanders outside, absorbs the wonder of nature and then names his child on the first thing he sees. Why do you ask, Two dogs fucking?"
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Are you a shark?
Cause I've got some swimmers for you to swallow.
Their was a camel and elephant, the elephant said to the camel.
"How come you have your t*ts on your back?" and the camel got offended so he told the elephant.
"Well why do you have your d*ck on your face?"
I lost my virginity.
Can I have yours?
Q: What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her more attractive?
A: Her ankles.
A woman asks an agriculturalist: "Please, tell me what shall I do? I have a garden but nothing grows there, like flowers or vegetables."
The agriculturalist says: "You know, it is to dung the garden with a good fertilizer."
The woman says: "And wouldn´t it be better to plant the vegetables directly into the ass?"
Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
A: A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it...
A beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a gynecologist.
The doctor took one look at this woman and all his professionalism went out the window.
He immediately told her to undress.
After she had disrobed the doctor began to stroke her thigh.
He asked her, “Do you know what I’m doing?”
“Yes,” she replied, “you’re checking for any abrasions or dermatological abnormalities.”
“That is right,” said the doctor.
He then began to fondle her breasts.
“Do you know what I’m doing now?” he asked.
“Yes,” the woman said, “you’re checking for any lumps or breast cancer.”
“Correct,” replied the shady doctor.
Finally, he mounts his patient and started having sexual intercourse with her.
He asked, “Do you know what I’m doing now?”
“Yes,” she said. “You’re getting herpes; which is why I came here in the first place!”
Billy woke up in the middle of the night, thirsty.
Instead of going to the kitchen though, he goes to his parents’ bedroom, while they were about to have sex and his father had a condom in his hand.
The father, surprised by his son entrance, bent over pretending to look for something.
"What are you looking for?" Billy asked.
"Aw, well..hmm.. I’m looking for a little mouse!" the father lied.
So, Billy spontaneously: "Why..? To “jump” it..?"
Dating a stripper is like eating a noisy bag of chips in church... everyone looks at you in disgust, but deep down inside they want some too.