Joke #5984

A helium molecule walks in afterwards. The bellhop asks if he needs any help. Helium doesn't react.
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has 51.81 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: math

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An astronomer, a physicist and a mathematician are on a train in Scotland. The astronomer looks out of the window, sees a black sheep standing in a field, and remarks, "How odd. Scottish sheep are black." "No, no, no!" says the physicist. "Only some Scottish sheep are black." The mathematician rolls his eyes at his companions' muddled thinking and says, "In Scotland, there is at least one field, containing at least one sheep, at least one side of which appears black from here."
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There are three kinds of accountants in the world. Those who can count and those who can't.
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Q: Did you hear that joke about the infinite line? A: Don’t worry, It doesn’t have a point!
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has 54.80 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: math
Two random variables were talking in a bar. They thought they were being discrete but I heard their chatter continuously.
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Welcome to the accounting department, where everybody counts.
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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 9!
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Little Johnny in Math Class. One day little Johnny was sitting in math class. The teacher asked him, "there are 3 crows on a fence the farmer shoots one how many are left?" Little Johnny replied "none." Confused the teacher asked again. "Johnny, there are 3 crows on the fence the farmer shoots 1 how many are left?" Johnny replies "0." Teacher says, "ok Little Johnny how are you getting this." Little Johnny replies, "if 1 crow dies then the other two fly away, 0 crows left." Teacher says "that's not the correct answer but I like the way your thinking." Little Johnny replies, "ok teach, there 3 girls in an ice-cream parlor. One is sucking the cone, one is licking the cone, and the other is biting the cone, which one is married?" The teacher replies, "I guess the one sucking the cone." Little Johnny says, "no bitch it's the one with the ring on her finger but, I like the way your thinking."
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has 71.34 % from 111 votes. More jokes about: dirty, little Johnny, math, school, vulgar
"Students nowadays are so clueless", the math professor complains to a colleague. "Yesterday, a student came to my office hours and wanted to know if General Calculus was a Roman war hero..."
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has 68.41 % from 118 votes. More jokes about: math
Johnny, if you had 5$ and you asked your father for 3$ more, how many dollars would you have? I would have five dollars... You don't know your arithmetic, Johnny... You don't know my father, Mrs. Mutch...
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has 74.65 % from 568 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, math, money
Chuck Norris can count the number of corners in a circle.
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has 50.90 % from 98 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, math