Joke #5471

Student: What’s infinity? Math Teacher: Think of a number. Student: Okay, I’ve got one. Teacher: Good. That’s not it.
Vote: has 70.87 % from 394 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: math

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Q: Do you know why infinity goes on forever? A: Because it knows Chuck Norris is waiting for it at the end.
Vote: has 57.16 % from 26 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, math
Q: How many cost accountants does it take to change a light bulb? A: Hmmm... I'll just do a few numbers and get back to you.
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: accountant, light bulb, math, work
Little Johnny was in Maths class when his teacher asked him: "Johnny, if your Mother had to repay a loan of $100,000, and you gave her $50,000, what would she need to repay the loan?" Johnny replied, "To repay the loan? $50,000 more. To stay alive? CPR."
Vote: has 56.65 % from 34 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, little Johnny, math, money, vulgar
Teacher: "Now class, whatever I ask, I want you to all answer at once. How much is six plus four?" Class: "At once!"
Vote: has 76.40 % from 710 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: math, school, teacher
How does a cow do math? With a cowculator.
Vote: has 45.29 % from 28 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, math
One day, Little Johnny was with his father at home. He asked: "What does "evolution" mean?" His father replied, "Figure it out." Next day, at school, during a math test, a boy raised his hand: "What's 289+308?" The teacher said: "Figure it out." Ten minutes later, Little Johnny looked at the boy and said: "Why don't you write "evolution"? Your teacher already told you!"
Vote: has 64.88 % from 18 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dad, little Johnny, math, school, stupid
Q: How do mathematicians induce good behavior in their children? A: "If I've told you n times, I've told you n+1 times..."
Vote: has 65.83 % from 72 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: math
An engineer and a physicist are in a hot-air balloon. After a few hours they lose track of where they are and descend to get directions. They yell to a jogger, "Hey, can you tell us where we're at?" After a few moments the jogger responds, "You're in a hot-air balloon." The engineer says, "You must be a mathematician." The jogger, shocked, responds, "yeah, how did you know I was a mathematician?" "Because, it took you far too long to come up with your answer, it was 100% correct, and it was completely useless."
Vote: has 72.52 % from 301 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: math, science
Chuck Norris does infinit loops in 4 seconds.
Vote: has 45.82 % from 24 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, math, time
Little Johnny was doing his math homework. He said to himself, "Two plus five, that son of a bitch is seven. Three plus six, that son of a bitch is nine." His mother heard what he was saying and gasped, "What are you doing?" The little boy answered, "I'm doing my math homework." "And this is how your teacher taught you to do it?" the mother asked. "Yes," he answered. Infuriated, the called Little Johnny's teacher the next day, "What are you teaching my son in class?" The teacher replied, "Right now, we are learning addition." The mother asked, "And are you teaching them to say two plus two, that son of a bitch is four?" After the teacher stopped laughing, she answered, "What I taught them was, two plus two, the sum of which is four."
Vote: has 83.10 % from 636 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: little Johnny, math, teacher, work