# Joke #5471

Student: What’s infinity? Math Teacher: Think of a number. Student: Okay, I’ve got one. Teacher: Good. That’s not it.
Vote: has 70.50 % from 389 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math

## Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Q: How do mathematicians induce good behavior in their children? A: "If I've told you n times, I've told you n+1 times..."
Vote: has 65.55 % from 68 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math
The teacher asked little Johnny, “What’s two and two?”. He counted 1-2-3-4 on his fingers and said, “Four, teacher?”. She said, ” Yes, that’s right, but you counted on your fingers. Put your hands behind behind your back and tell me what’s three and three”. He put his hands behind his back, fumbled around, and answered, “Six, teacher?”. She said, “Yes, that’s right, but you’re still counting on your fingers. Put your hands in your pockets and tell me what’s five and five”. He put his hands in his pockets, fumbled around, and replied, “Eleven, teacher?”.
Vote: has 76.02 % from 209 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: little Johnny, math, teacher, time
A lawyer, an engineer and a mathematician were called in for a test. The engineer went in first and was asked, "What is 2+2?" The engineer thought awhile and finally answered, "4." Then the mathemetician was called in and was asked the same question. With little thought he replied, "4.0" Then the lawyer was called in, and was asked the same question. The lawyer answered even quicker than the mathematician, "What do you want it to be?"
Vote: has 76.22 % from 71 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: lawyer, math
Teacher: "Little Johnny, give me a sentence using the word, 'geometry.'" Little Johnny: "A little acorn grew and grew until it finally awoke one day and said, 'Gee, I'm a tree.'"
Vote: has 76.75 % from 187 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: little Johnny, math, teacher
Why is it hard for a blonde to count to 70? Because 69 is such a mouthful.
Vote: has 56.92 % from 37 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, math
What do accountants suffer from that ordinary people don't? Depreciation.
Vote: has 68.80 % from 25 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: accountant, math
Q: What's a polygon? A: A dead parrot.
Vote: has 32.12 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: bird, death, math, parrot
Little Johnny was in Maths class when his teacher asked him: "Johnny, if your Mother had to repay a loan of \$100,000, and you gave her \$50,000, what would she need to repay the loan?" Johnny replied, "To repay the loan? \$50,000 more. To stay alive? CPR."
Vote: has 60.15 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, little Johnny, math, money, vulgar
A team of engineers were required to measure the height of a flag pole. They only had a measuring tape, and were getting quite frustrated trying to keep the tape along the pole. It kept falling down, etc. A mathematician comes along, finds out their problem, and proceeds to remove the pole from the ground and measure it easily. When he leaves, one engineer says to the other: "Just like a mathematician! We need to know the height, and he gives us the length!"
Vote: has 71.56 % from 67 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math
Maths is like s*x... ADD the bed MINUS the clothes DIVIDE the legs and pray you don't MULTIPLY.
Vote: has 63.24 % from 199 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math, sex