Joke #5471

Student: What’s infinity? Math Teacher: Think of a number. Student: Okay, I’ve got one. Teacher: Good. That’s not it.
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has 71.08 % from 397 votes. More jokes about: math

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Q: How do you know if a Chinese tried to rob your house? A: You get home and your maths homework is done, your computer is upgraded, and two hours later He is still trying to back out of your driveway.
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Teacher: "Are you good at math?" Pupil: "Yes and no." Teacher: "What do you mean?" Pupil: "Yes, I'm no good at math!"
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has 69.85 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: math, school, teacher
Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline. If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5, and 6. If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call. If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship. If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are manic-depressive, it doesn’t matter which number you press, no one will answer. If you are dyslexic, press 969696969696969. If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the dash key until a representative comes on the line. If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother’s maiden name. If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 000. If you have bipolar disorder, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep. If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9…
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has 80.65 % from 255 votes. More jokes about: health, life, math, phone
Welcome to the accounting department, where everybody counts.
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has 72.95 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: accountant, math, work
Chuck Norris can cross all Seven Bridges of Konigsberg, making all the current laws of Math, obsolete.
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has 52.38 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, math
Q: Why accountants don't read novels? A: Because the only numbers in them are page numbers.
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has 62.91 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: accountant, math, nerd
Dear Maths, Please grow up now and solve you problems yourself.
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has 59.05 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: math
Q:Why do they never serve beer at a math party? A:Because you can't drink and derive...
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has 57.10 % from 72 votes. More jokes about: math
Q: Do you know why infinity goes on forever? A: Because it knows Chuck Norris is waiting for it at the end.
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has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, math
What do you get when you put root beer in a square glass? Beer.
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has 66.72 % from 81 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, geek, math