Joke #6049

Q: What do blondes and railroad tracks have in common? A: They've both been laid all over America.

An Australian guy walks into a bar with a crocodile under his arm. He asks the bartender if he will give him free drinks if he shows he can put his penis inside the crocs mouth for 15 seconds without it getting bit off. The bartender agrees. The guy opens the crocs mouth and puts his penis inside it; the croc gently closes his mouth and after 15 seconds the Australian hits him over the head with a bottle, causing the croc to open his mouth and let the guy withdraw his penis. The bartender starts serving the free drinks to the Austr alian and then tells everyone in the bar "If anyone else can do that then I will give them free drinks also". There is a pause and then a blonde woman calls out "ok, I will do it but please don't hit me so hard over my head with the bottle".

Q: What's a blonde's favourite wine? A: "Daaaddy, I want to go to Miaaami!"

Q: What is a turkey's favorite dessert? A: Peach gobbler.

There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead, who were all stranded on an island. One day they found a genie and he said he would grant them three wishes. All three of them agreed that each of them would get one wish each. The brunette said, "I wish I was home in my bed and that this never happened." and poof, her wish was granted. The redhead said, "I wish that I was at home in my bed and this never happened." and poof, her wish was granted. Then the blond said, "I wish my friends were here with me."

Why are so many blondes rushing out to get breast implants? So they don't have to pay the flat tax.

Two blondes are walking down the road when one says "Look at that dog with one eye!" The other blonde covers one of her eyes and says "Where?"

Q: What was the dentist doing in Panama? A: Looking for the Root Canal!

How long does it take Chuck Norris to get to Asia? 2 months... How does he get there? He walks.

Chuck Norris once went skydiving but promised never to do it again. One Grand Canyon is enough.

Two blondes drive through the middle of Kansas, surrounded entirely by wheat fields. One blonde says, "Look over there!" They see another blonde in scuba gear acting like she's swimming through the wheat. The blonde driving says, "It's girls like that who give us blondes a bad name." The other blonde says, "Yeah! And if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and tell her off."