Joke #7357

Q:Why did the woman cross the road? A I don't know, the real question is, why was she out of the kitchen?
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Q: What's the similarity between a woman and dog poop? A: The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.
Vote: has 61.89 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

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Q: You know why women haven't landed on the moon? A: Because there is no shopping centre.
Vote: has 58.56 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

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Snooki is so short and orange that she works part time as a traffic cone.
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There was a crooked woman, who ran a crooked mile. She found a crooked Weiner, who always made her smile. She belongs in prison, for she is just a crook. And if you don't believe me, you can read it in her book.
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

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I like my girl to be Hannah on the streets but Miley in the sheets.
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

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Teacher: "Ramu, you talk a lot !" Ramu: "It's a family tradition". Teacher: "What do you mean?" Ramu: "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher". Teacher: "What about your mother?" Ramu: "She's a woman".
Vote: has 73.88 % from 118 votes. Send joke:

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Women are like telephones. They love to be held. They love to be talked to. But, if you press the wrong button, you're disconnected.
Vote: has 78.92 % from 307 votes. Send joke:

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Q: What is the difference between a pizza and a women? A: The pizza can be eaten but the women can't!
Vote: has 39.39 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

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This woman walks into a bar, and she has the hairiest armpits in the history of armpits. She sits down, raises her arm, and says, "Bartender, I would like a drink." There's an old drunk sitting next to her. Slurring, he says, "Barkeep, I would like to buy the ballerina a drink." She accepts, drinks it, raises her arm again to get the bartender's attention, and orders another. The old man says, "Barkeep, you just keep giving the ballerina anything she wants." Finally, the bartender goes over to the drunk and says, "Sir, that's nice of you, but how do you know she's a ballerina?" The old man answers, "Son, you don't get to be my age without learning that only ballerinas can lift their legs that high."
Vote: has 62.22 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

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Woman: Is there a problem, Officer? Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding. Woman: Oh, I see. Officer: Can I see your license please? Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one. Officer: Don't have one? Woman: Lost it 4 times for drunk driving. Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please. Woman: I can't do that. Officer: Why not? Woman: I stole this car. Officer: Stole it? Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner. Officer: You what? Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see. The Officer looks at the woman, slowly backs away to his car, and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun. Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle. Woman: Is there a problem sir? Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner. Woman: Murdered the owner? Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please. The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk. Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am? Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The first officer is stunned. Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license. The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer snaps open the clutch purse and examines the license. He looks quite puzzled. Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner. Woman: Betcha the lying bastard told you I was speeding too.
Vote: has 83.59 % from 437 votes. Send joke:

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