Joke #7970

Yo mommas so stupid when she licked a dog she said meow.
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More jokes about: animal, dog, insulting, stupid, Yo mama

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A stranger was seated next to Little Johnny on the plane when the stranger turned to the Little Johnny and said, "Let's talk. I've heard that flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger." Little Johnny, who had just opened his book, closed it slowly, and said to the stranger, "What would you like to discuss?" "Oh, I don't know," said the stranger. "How about nuclear power?" "OK," said Little Johnny. "That could be an interesting topic.But let me ask you a question first." "A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat grass. The same stuff. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?" "Jeez," said the stranger. "I have no idea." "Well, then," said Little Johnny, "How is it that you feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don't know shit?"
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More jokes about: animal, little Johnny, stupid
Little Johnny is constantly late for school and what's worse is that he always has a big lie explaining why. The teacher tells the principal that she has had it with his exaggerations. The principal tells her to send Johnny to him the next time he shows up late. He will tell Johnny a lie so big that he will never tell another one. Ever. The next day, Johnny shows up two hours late. Johnny says, "I was two hours early today so I had time to fish in the pond on my way to school. I caught a 17-pound trout and had to take it home. If I didn't clean it and freeze it, my mom would've been angry. That's why I'm so late". The teacher promptly takes him to the principal's office and explains the story to the principal. The principal tells Johnny about his own trip to school that day. He says, "I was walking to school through the park on the trail today when I heard something behind me. I turned around and was shocked to see a giant grizzly bear behind me. He was 24 feet tall and had 6-inch fangs. He was going to eat me, Johnny! Just then a little dog ran out from the bushes, jumped up and attacked the bear. The little dog killed the bear and then ate the whole bear right there in front of me. What do you think of that, Johnny?" Johnny replies, "Oh yeah, that's my dog Sparky. That's his third bear this week."
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More jokes about: animal, dog, little Johnny, school
A hound dog lays in the yard and an old man in overalls sits on the porch. "Excuse me, sir, but does your dog bite?" a jogger asks. The old man looks over his newspaper and replies, "Nope." As soon as the jogger enters the yard, the dog begins snarling and growling, and then attacks the jogger's legs. As the jogger flails around in the yard, he yells, "I thought you said your dog didn't bite!" The old man mutters, "Ain't my dog."
Vote: has 84.38 % from 238 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, dog, life
Yo momma so ugly she threw a boomerang and it refused to come back.
Vote: has 83.75 % from 4849 votes. Send joke:

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Yo Mamas so stupid she was yelling into the mailbox. We ask her whats she doing and she said, she was sending a voice-mail.
Vote: has 83.62 % from 5669 votes. Send joke:

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Yo Momma So Fat The Only Letters She Knows In The Alphabet Are K.F.C!
Vote: has 83.50 % from 4378 votes. Send joke:

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Yo' Mama's cooking is so bad, the homeless give it back.
Vote: has 83.50 % from 5708 votes. Send joke:

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Yo momma so stupid, when I told her that she lost her mind, she went looking for it.
Vote: has 83.10 % from 3578 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: insulting, stupid, Yo mama
Yo mamma so ugly even Bob the Builder said, "We cant fix it."
Vote: has 83.02 % from 3537 votes. Send joke:

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Q: How does a blonde kill a worm? A: She burys it.
Vote: has 82.72 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, blonde, death, stupid