What do you call a black woman who got an abortion?
A member of crimestoppers of america.
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Once upon time, there were three friends playing on a beach.
One kid's parents were good business people.
The second kid lives in a good family where he is taught to respect his elders.
The third kid was a poor redneck with an abusive father.
Anyways, they were playing on the beach when a helicopter crashed down into the water.
They saw a man drowning and all raced to save him.
As they pulled the man to shore they realized it was Obama.
The president then said, "Thank you kids for saving me! I'll give you each one wish!"
The first kid said he wanted a helicopter.
The second kid wished for some money.
And the redneck asked for a wheel chair.
Obama, concerned, asked why the poor boy wouldn't want some money for his family.
The kid replied, "Cause when pap finds out what I've done, I ain't gonna be walking for a pretty long time."
A 5 year old black boy walks up to a 5 year old white boy and says, "My daddy's goy a car.
When he honks the horn it goes 'honkey honkey'".
Little white boy says, "shit, my daddys got a chain saw when he starts it up it goes 'run nigga nigga run'".
How do you steal a Mexicans home?
Hook it up to your truck and drive off.
There were three guys in Hell - Iranian, American, and a Chinese man.
They asked Satan to let them call their family.
The American called and talked for 10 minutes.
He payed $1,000.
The Chinaman called and talked for 15 minutes.
He payed $2,000.
The Iranian talked for an hour and only paid $10.
The other men complained and Satan responded, "A call from Hell to Hell is local.
What's the difference between a black man and a daycare?
A daycare knows when it has children.
Q: Why do Americans like black candles?
A: Because it reminds them of 'the good old days'.
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How do you starve a black person?
Put their food stamps under a job application.
Q: What do you call a white man in the ghetto?
A: A victim.
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How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. They just beat the room for being black.
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Q: Why do black people lean to the center of their car?
A: They think the smell is coming from the outside.
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