Joke #8964

One day a black white and Asian got arrested but the cop said if u can say green pink and yellow in a sentence, then u won't go to jail. The black didn't know what to say so he went to jail. The white said "well white guys are pink....." but the cop said wrong order so he went to jail. So the Asian guy said "well the phone go Green green so i pink up the phone and say yellow"

Q: What's the difference between a black fairy tale and a white one? A: White one starts like "once upon a time" Black one starts like " y'all muthaf*ckas gotta here dis"

Chuck Norris lives on The Road Not Taken.

Two politician are having lunch together, all of a sudden one stood up and shouted, "Your lying." The other replied, "I know but just hear me out."

Two statues, male and female, faced each other in the city park for many years. An angel appeared before the statues and said, "Since the two of you have been exemplary statues and have brought enjoyment to many people, I am giving you the gift of life. You have 30 minutes to do whatever you desire." The statues came to life and smiled at each other. They ran toward some nearby woods and dove behind a couple of bushes. The angel smiled to himself as he listened to the two statues giggling, bushes rustling and twigs snapping. After 15 minutes, the two statues emerged from the bushes, satisfied and smiling. Puzzled, the angel looked at his watch and asked the statues, "You still have 15 minutes. Would you like to continue?" The male statue looked at the female and asked, "Do you want to do it again?" Giggling, the female statue said, "Sure, but this time, you hold the pigeon down and I'll crap on its head!"

When I was young I used to pray for a bike, then I realized that God doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness.

Q: How did the butcher introduce his wife? A: Meet Patty.

A man with a bad rash on his hands went to his doctor. The latter examined his hands carefully for sometime and consulted many large volumes on his shelves. Finally, he asked the patient: "Have you had this trouble before?" He answered: "Yes." Doctor said: "You have again got it."

Q: How is a boss better than a wife? A: A boss at least pays you for making your life miserable.

At the Court discussion between judge and villager: So you was propeling surrogate alcohol? Me? No! What do you mean no? You have a device for that... means propeled. Then please judge me also for rape... So you have raped someone also? Well no... but I have a device...

The doctor said he would have me on my feet in two weeks." "And did he?" "Yes, I had to sell the car to pay the bill."