Joke #991

Had a fight with an erection this morning. I beat it single handedly.
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has 86.09 % from 627 votes. More jokes about: dirty

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Johnny comes home from school and asks his mom what is a "period". His mom says that "A period is when a woman needs to realease her dead egg cells". Johnny asks what color is it. She says it's red. Johnny said "I have one of those but mine is white and it makes babies."
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has 45.24 % from 75 votes. More jokes about: baby, dirty, little Johnny, school, women
On Sunday little Johnny with his dad went for bathing. The ground was slippery. So poor boy for avoiding of knocking down grabbed his father's penis. His father smiled and told him: "Oh boy you are lucky. If you were with your mother you were concussion!"
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has 57.21 % from 106 votes. More jokes about: dad, dirty, health, little Johnny, women
Chuck Norris grabs Donald Trump by the pussy.
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has 51.18 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, dirty, political
When two men have sex what position are they going to be in? But what about when two dogs have sex? That means that the two men are having sex doggy style then what ways are the dogs having sex? That means that the dogs are having an affair with the men to have sex doggy style.
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has 26.11 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: dirty, dog, gay, sex
Two married buddies are out drinking one night when one turns to the other and says, "You know, I don't know what else to do. Whenever I go home after we've been out drinking, I turn the headlights off before I get to the driveway. I shut off the engine and coast into the garage. I take my shoes off before I go into the house, I sneak up the stairs, I get undressed in the bathroom. I ease into bed and my wife STILL wakes up and yells at me for staying out so late!" His buddy looks at him and says, "Well, you're obviously taking the wrong approach. I screech into the driveway, slam the door, storm up the steps, throw my shoes into the closet, jump into bed, rub my hands on my wife's ass and say, 'How about a blowjob?' ....and she's always sound asleep."
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has 80.56 % from 328 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, dirty, drunk, wife
Coco Chanel once said that you should put perfume on places where you want to be kissed by a man. But hell does that burn!
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has 75.28 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: dirty, men, women
A woman walks into a drugstore and asks the pharmacist if he sells size extra large condoms. He replies, "Yes we do. Would you like to buy some?" She responds, "No sir, but do you mind if I wait around here until someone does?"
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has 82.48 % from 607 votes. More jokes about: dirty, drug, women
Babe when I die I want you to cremate me, pour my ashes into a bowl of chili, and eat me just so I can tear that ass up one more time!
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has 57.35 % from 96 votes. More jokes about: death, dirty
Knock, Knock Who is there? A long erected penis with an eye on my head and some wools in my feet. What do you want? Is there any body to suck me? I want to weep.
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has 70.70 % from 450 votes. More jokes about: dirty, knock-knock, sex
Q: Do you know what 69 is? A: It's a good thing screwed up by a period.
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has 34.88 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex, women