The best little Johnny jokes

The teacher asked little Johnny if he knew his numbers yet. "Yes, teacher," he said, "my dad taught me." "Good, Johnny. Tell me what comes after two," the teacher said. "Three," replied little Johnny. "Very good. What comes after five, Johnny?" asked the teacher. "Six," answered little Johnny. "Excellent. Your dad did a very good job. Now, what comes after ten?" the teacher asked. "A Jack!" replied little Johnny.
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has 58.17 % from 153 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny
Little Johnny was at school one day when the teacher asked the kids if they could use the word definitely in a sentence. Well the first little girl raised her hand and said, "Well the trees are definitely green." The teacher said "No not really because the trees turn yellow red and brown in the fall." The next little boy raised his hand and said, "The sky is definitely blue." The teacher said, "No not really because the sky can be all different colors." From the back of the room little Johnny raised his hand and asked, "Do farts have lumps?" The teacher said, "No Johnny of course not, that’s silly." Then Johnny said, "Well then I definitely shit my pants!"
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has 57.00 % from 90 votes. More jokes about: fart, kids, little Johnny, school, teacher
Johny visits the psychiatrist and tells him: "Lately I have a big problem with my memory." The psychiatrist asks Johny: "And how does it demonstrate concretely?" Johny: "What?"
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has 56.65 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: communication, doctor, little Johnny, memory
Little Johnny walked into the house covered in filth. His mom asked, "Johnny, why do you always get so dirty?" Johnny replied, " I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are."
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has 56.41 % from 134 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny
Little Johnny had finished his summer vacation and gone back to school. Two days later his teacher phoned his mother to tell her that he was misbehaving. “Wait a minute,” she said. “I had Johnny with me for three months and I never called you once when he misbehaved.”
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has 56.17 % from 153 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, phone, school, teacher
Teacher: "How much is half of 8?" Little Johnny: "Up and down or across?" Teacher: "What do you mean?" Little Johnny: "Well, up and down makes a 3 or across the middle leaves a 0!"
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has 56.06 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, math
Little Johnny asks his mum, "Mum, do all fairy tales begin with 'Once upon a time in a faraway land'?"  "No darling," says his mother, somewhat distressed, "Sometimes, they can begin with 'I've got too much work in the office tonight, I'll come home later'."
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has 55.87 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, work
Little Johnny, "Why are you so fat?" Little Billy, "Cause Every time I fuck ur mom she gives me a doughnut."
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has 55.57 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: dirty, little Johnny, sex, vulgar, Yo mama
Johnny, George, and Bert were driving along in their pickup when they saw a sheep caught in the fence with its hind end up in the air. Bert said, "I wish that was Sharon Stone." George echoed, "I wish it was Demi Moore." Little Johnny sighed, "I wish it was dark..."
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has 53.99 % from 150 votes. More jokes about: animal, little Johnny
During a conversation regarding new potential Johny's job: "Johny, tell us and what is your weak feature?" Johny: "Openness!" Interviewer: "But the openness isn't a weak feature!" Johny: "Ok, but I fuck what you think!"
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has 53.62 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: communication, little Johnny, vulgar, work
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