The best medical jokes

A scientist tells a pharmacist, "Give me some prepared tablets of acetylsalicylic acid." "Do you mean aspirin?" asks the pharmacist. The scientist slaps his forehead. "That's it!" he says. "I can never remember the name."
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has 74.36 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: chemistry, geek, medical, memory, science
Q: What is the difference between a Vitamin and a Hormone? A: You can't hear a vitamin.
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has 73.44 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: health, insulting, medical, women
Q: Did you hear about the new Viagra eye-drops? A: Apparently they make you look hard.
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has 72.95 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: health, medical, viagra
Q: Why is it that so many lawyers have broken noses? A: From chasing parked ambulances.
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has 72.63 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: health, lawyer, medical, stupid
Q: Whats the generic form of Viagra? A: Mycoxaflopin.
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has 72.56 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: medical, viagra
A man and his wife went to the pharmacy to pick up his prescription for Viagra. Seeing the $10 per pill price his wife was astonished - but then realized "it's only going to cost us $30 per year."
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has 71.97 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: marriage, medical, money, sex, viagra
After giving birth, I quit my job. The exit questionnaire asked, "What steps would have prevented you from leaving?" My answer: "Birth control."
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has 71.52 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: baby, birthday, medical, work
The nose drops „Big smeller" – let´s have a blow-out.
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has 71.43 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: health, medical
A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice. After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you're out of the office?" "I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I send them a bill." The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try. The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills. When he went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer.
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has 71.00 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: doctor, lawyer, medical, party
A man and a woman meet in an elevator. "Where are you heading today?" the man asks. "I'm going down to give blood." "How much do you get paid for giving blood?" "About $20." "Wow," says the man, "I'm going up to donate sperm, and the sperm bank pays $100." The woman angrily gets off the elevator. The next day, the man and woman meet in the elevator again. "Fancy meeting you again. Where you off to today?" "Sperm bank," she says with her mouth full.
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has 70.08 % from 140 votes. More jokes about: medical, men, money, sex, women