The best parrot jokes

One day, an old guy gets on a bus. Several minutes later a punk kid with red, green, and orange hair gets on. The kid notices that the old man keeps staring at him. "What you staring at, old man? Ain't you ever done anything wild in your time?" "Yeah. I screwed a parrot once. I was wondering if you were my son?"
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has 65.00 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: dirty, parrot, sex
Q: What is a parrot's favorite game? A: Hide and Speak!
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has 63.22 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: bird, communication, game, parrot
A man enters a pet shop. He wants to buy live mice to feed his python. The man saw the cage with a parrot and begins to examine it. In this moment the parrot said, "Your fly is undone." The man blushed. He looked around if anyone sees him and closed his zipper. The parrot said again, "Your pants have a slit back." The man blushed still more and tried to cover his ass with a hand. "Your shoelaces are untied", the parrot does not cease. The man bent down to tie his shoelaces. "Farted! ... You little fart", the parrot yelled. The man died of shame and fled from the store. At this point the mice called from their cage and said, "Coco, thanks you! You saved our lives again. You know, we'll make it up to you."
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has 59.71 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, fart, parrot
What happens when you kiss a canary? You get chirpes, it can't be tweeted because its a canarial disease.
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has 53.78 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, health, parrot
A housewife buys a parrot to keep her company during the day. The clerk warns that the parrot was donated by a brothel, where he may have picked up some colorful language. The housewife doesn't mind and brings the parrot home. When she uncovers the cage, the parrot says, "Brawkk! New Madam. Hello Madam." When her three daughters come home from school, the parrot says, "Brawkk! New Girls. Hello Girls." Finally, her husband, Phil, comes home from work, just in time for dinner. When he walks past the parrot, the parrot says, "Brawkk! Hi Phil!"
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has 52.50 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: marriage, parrot
Q: What do you get if you cross a parrot with a shark? A: A bird that will talk your ear off!
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has 50.64 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, communication, parrot
Q: Where do pirates buy their parrot food? A: Petsmarrrrrrrrt!
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has 46.60 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: food, parrot, pirate
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
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has 45.82 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, parrot
George was taking care of a parrot for his aunt. This parrot was a very nasty parrot. It cussed and screamed and made fun of George, so he took the parrot and put it in the freezer. The parrot kept screaming and insulting George until finally it stopped. George thought to himself, “On no! I froze my aunt’s bird to death.” He opened the door and saw the bird alive! The bird said, “I’m sorry for my behaviour and will never act up again. George said, “Why the change?” The bird answered, “Because I saw what you did to the other bird."
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has 38.22 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, death, parrot
Q: What's a polygon? A: A dead parrot.
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has 30.27 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: bird, death, math, parrot
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