The best student jokes

A first-grade teacher can't 
believe her student isn't hepped up about the Super Bowl. "It's a huge event. Why aren't you excited?" "Because I'm not a football fan. My parents love basketball, so I do too," says the student. "Well, that's a lousy reason," says the teacher. "What if your parents were morons? What would you be then?" "Then I'd be a football fan."
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: football, student, teacher
"What happened to your girlfriend, that really cute math student?" "She no longer is my girlfriend. I caught her cheating on me." "I don't believe that she cheated on you!" "Well, a couple of nights ago I called her on the phone, and she told me that she was in bed wrestling with three unknowns..."
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has 63.12 % from 94 votes. More jokes about: math, phone, relationship, student
Teacher: What happened in 1869? Student: Mahatma Gandhi was born. Teacher: What happened in 1873? Student: Gandhi was four years old
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has 62.44 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: kids, student, teacher, time
Q: Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet? A: Because they can spend years at C!
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has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: pirate, student, time
Teacher: What's 2 and 2? Pupil: 4 Teacher: That's good. Pupil: Good? That's perfect!
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has 61.94 % from 82 votes. More jokes about: kids, math, school, student, teacher
One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A pre-med student rudely interrupted to ask, "Why do we have to learn this pointless information" "To save lives." the professor responded quickly and continued the lecture. A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?" he persisted. "It keeps the ignoramuses like you out of medical school," replied the professor.
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has 61.89 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: school, science, student
PE Teacher: "Why did you kick that ball straight at the school computer?" Pupil: "You told me to put it on the Net."
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has 61.01 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: computer, internet, sport, student, teacher
Q: Why did the students study in the airplane? A: Because they wanted higher grades.
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has 60.56 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: airplane, student
I remember my guidance counselor. The guy studied for years for his job, and deepest thing he ever said to me was, "You have your whole life ahead of you."
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has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: graduation, memory, student, time, work
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, he said: "Now, students, if I stood on my head the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I should turn red in the face." "Yes, sir," the boys said. "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little fellow shouted, "It's because yer feet ain't empty."
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has 57.82 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: school, student, teacher
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