The best age jokes

Chuck Norris got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds.
Vote: has 59.93 % from 25 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, Chuck Norris, time
My kid and I were in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. So I put my hand around my kid and told him "Well son, that's because daddy isn't aroused by men."
Vote: has 59.31 % from 51 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, dad, dirty
A 5 year old and a 3 year old are upstairs in their bedroom "You know what?" says the 5 year old, "I think it's about time we started swearing." The 3 year old nods his head in approval, so the 5 year old says, "When we go downstairs for breakfast I'm gonna swear first, then you swear after me, ok?" "Ok" the 3 year old, agrees with enthusiasm. The mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 5 year old what he wants for breakfast. "Shit mum, I don't know, I suppose I'll have some Fruit Loops." (WHACK...she spanks him) He flew out of his chair, tumbled across the kitchen floor, got up, and ran upstairs crying his eyes out. She looked at the 3 year old and asked with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?" "I don't know mum, but it won't be fucking Fruit Loops."
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, food, kids
What weighs 35 tons, has four fuzzy ears and is 80 million years old? Two rabbits riding a brontosaurus.
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, animal
For his surprise 50th birthday party, Chuck Norris turned up early. No one surprises Chuck Norris.
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, birthday, Chuck Norris
You are so old, you fart dust.
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, fart, insulting
Friendly reminder that Adele and Taylor Swift are the same age, yet one is pregnant and another stuck in middle school.
Vote: has 58.75 % from 18 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, celebrity, kids, life, music
A son and the dad are walking around on the streets. The dad stops the son and says, "Son, if you don't stop masturbating, you are going to go blind." The son says, "Dad! I'm over here!"
Vote: has 58.56 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, dad, kids, life, masturbation
Imagine, there are on the bus only 5 persons: A busman, an old woman, two younger women and one man. The old woman comes to the busman and tells him: "Dear busman, would you like to eat a few hazelnuts?" The busman says: "Yes, why not?" He takes the hazelnuts from her hand and eats them. This repeats even two times, but when the old woman offers other hazelnuts to the busman for the fourth time, the busman asks this old woman: "Madame, where do you take all these hazelnuts from? It is a real amount and I am already full." The old woman only says: "You know, dear busman, I have bought the chocolate with hazelnuts, the hazelnuts are very hard for my dental plate, so I have sucked them all out, brought it to you and you have already eaten them all."
Vote: has 58.51 % from 24 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, chocolate, dentist, disgusting, food
Yo mama so old her drivers license in hieroglyphics.
Vote: has 57.40 % from 43 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, car, insulting, Yo mama


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