The best baby jokes

What bounces up and down at 100mph? A baby tied to the back of a truck.
Vote:
has 21.53 % from 111 votes. More jokes about: baby, car, disgusting
How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head.
Vote:
has 20.45 % from 83 votes. More jokes about: baby, black humor, dirty
A couple of Yogi Berra's team mates on the Yankees ball club swear that one night the stocky catcher was horrified to see a baby toppling off the roof of a cottage across the way from him. Yogi dashed over and made a miraculous catch - but then force of habit proved too much for him. He straightened up and threw the baby to second base.
Vote:
has 20.26 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: baby, sport
What is the definition of revenge? A baby with a dog in its mouth.
Vote:
has 18.59 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: animal, baby, disgusting, dog
What's blue and flies around the room at high speeds? A baby with a punctured lung.
Vote:
has 15.05 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: baby, black humor
What's purple, covered in pus and squeals? A peeled baby in a bag of salt.
Vote:
has 14.11 % from 143 votes. More jokes about: baby, black humor
What's brown and gurgles? A baby in a casserole.
Vote:
has 13.68 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: baby, black humor
LaShaunda had just given birth to a daughter and discussed possible names with her hospital roommate, LaQoowanga. LaShwanda mentioned a name she had heard in the doctor's office, "Vagina". When the hospital personnel asked her what name to put on the birth certificate, LaShaunda said "Vagina". "You can't name your baby that!" "Don't disrespect me! I be her mama. I can names her anything I want." When the hospital person tried to explained what the name meant, LaShaunda said, "No, No! that's a cootchie!"
Vote:
has 13.55 % from 99 votes. More jokes about: baby, disgusting, hospital
<<<17
Choose Another →
Page 17 of 17.