Girlfriend pregnant error... Abort, Marry, Ignore?
Q: Why do you put babies into a blender feet first?
A: So you can see the look in their eyes when you turn it on!
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Smith was hit by a car, died, and went to heaven.
And everyone who goes to heaven has to work.
God went up to Smith, and said: Smith, you are going to make babies.
Here is this wheel, and every time you turn it, a baby will come out.
For hours, Smith spun the wheel at full speed, then he started to get tired.
As he was slowing down, a black baby came out...and Smith said: **** I better hurry because they are burning."
Why would the cannibal only eat babies?
He was on a diet!
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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor?
A baby playing in a plastic bag.
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Q: Why was the black baby crying?
A: He had diarea and thought he was melting.
What is special about a dead baby over all other forms of life?
You can achieve deep throat from whichever way you enter.
What bounces up and down at 100mph?
A baby tied to the back of a truck.
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How did the live baby escape from a room filled with with zombie babies?
He ate his way out.
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How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole?
Stick a javelin through it's head.
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