Last year Chuck Norris won the prize for best float at the Carnival in Rio simply by walking in the parade wearing his cowboy hat.
Chuck Norris was sitting around a campfire with two cowboys. The cowboys were competing to see which one is more hardcore. The first one says," Once, I was charged by an angry bull. I proceeded to jump on its back and kill it by gorging its eyes out." The second says, " Once I was swimming in a river, and an annocanda tried to strangle me. I ripped its head off with my teeth." Chuck norris just smiles and continues tending to the campfire with his penis.
Q: Where do cowboys cook their meals? A: On the range.
Q: What do you call a frog who wants to be a cowboy? A: Hoppalong Cassidy.
Q: What did the cowboy maggot say when he went into the saloon bar? A: Gimme a slug of whiskey.
Chuck Norris once rode a bull, and nine months later it had a calf.
Q. What's the difference between tampons and cowboy hats? A. Cowboy hats are for ass holes.
A cowboy and a retard are sitting at home bored. The cowboy says," let's go down to the bowling alley and beat up niggers." The retard says ," OK ". When they arrive , the cowboy sees five black dudes bowling. He goes over and starts beating their asses. He stops and looks to see the retard smashing bowling balls with a sledgehammer. He goes over and says, " hey... I thought we was gonna beat up niggers?" The retard responds, " yeah...you get the live ones, I'll kill the eggs ."
Chuck Norris killed Heath Ledger... nobody ruins the image of cowboys and lives.
Q: Why did the cowboy have sh*t in his mustache? A: Cuz he'd been lookin for love in all the wrong places.