Q: What do you call someone who doesn't fart in public?
A: A private tooter. 
Vote:
A guy says, "Doc, you gotta help me. Every time I fart, it sounds like, "Honda."
The doctor says, "You say, 'Honda?'"
"No," the guy says. "My farts do."
So, the doctor says, "OK, open your mouth," and looks inside.
After about two minutes, the doctor says, "I'm sorry, I can't help you, you need to go see a dentist."
The guy says, "Why a dentist?"
The doctor says, "Because you have an absessed tooth."
The guy says, "What the hell does that have to do with my condition?"
The doctor says, "Well, didn't you know? Absess makes the farts go Honda!"
Vote:
Yo mamas so fat that she fought a war with her own farts.
Every time Chuck Norris farts a hurricane forms.
Vote:
Q: What do women and cats have in common?
A: Pussy farts.
Yo mama so fat she the one that caused global warming when she farted.
Your fart's so loud, astronauts in space mistook your fart for a message from Houston!
Vote:
Q: What do women and cats have in common?
A: Pussy farts.
Vote:
Why do women always fart only when they go to the bathroom?
They have to blow dry—and there's nothing to shake.
Vote:
Confucius say, man who fart in church sit in own pew.