The best fart jokes

A guy says, "Doc, you gotta help me. Every time I fart, it sounds like, "Honda." The doctor says, "You say, 'Honda?'" "No," the guy says. "My farts do." So, the doctor says, "OK, open your mouth," and looks inside. After about two minutes, the doctor says, "I'm sorry, I can't help you, you need to go see a dentist." The guy says, "Why a dentist?" The doctor says, "Because you have an absessed tooth." The guy says, "What the hell does that have to do with my condition?" The doctor says, "Well, didn't you know? Absess makes the farts go Honda!"
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has 35.28 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, doctor, fart
Your fart's so loud, astronauts in space mistook your fart for a message from Houston!
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has 34.72 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart
Q: What do you call someone who doesn't fart in public? A: A private tooter.
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has 33.37 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart
Q: What do women and cats have in common? A: Pussy farts.
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has 32.98 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting, fart, women
Q. What is the difference between a blonde and a refrigerator? A. A refrigerator doesn't fart when you pull your meat out of it.
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has 29.01 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: blonde, fart
Why do women always fart only when they go to the bathroom? They have to blow dry—and there's nothing to shake.
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has 29.01 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart, women
Why fart and waste when you can burp and taste?
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has 27.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart
Q: What do you call it when someone farts in a gay bar? A: A love call.
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has 25.31 % from 144 votes. More jokes about: fart, gay, love
Confucius say, man who fart in church sit in own pew.
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has 23.03 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: fart, men
I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my gas with the beat of the music. After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee, and noticed that everybody was staring at me... Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.
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has 14.61 % from 13002 votes. More jokes about: fart, food, life, music
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