The moon is just a football Chuck Norris kicked up when he was a kid.
Coach: Your roommate and the captain of the team reported that you have many bad words for me in your sleep! So do you abuse me in your sleep! Football Player: Coach, It is just not true! Coach: What is not true, I trust the captain and I am asking this in front of him! Football player: Coach, It is untrue that I was sleeping!
Yo mama so ugly that the football team yelled at her to get out of the bus.
"Football is a game when 22 big, strong players run around like crazy for two hours while 50,000 people who really need the exercise sit in the stands and watch them."
An Arabic kid joined my football team. All he did was blow the plays.
Chuck Norris can win a football game by spiking a tennis ball over a volleyball net.
Why did the football coach go to the bank? "To get his Quarter back."
What did the cow wear to the football game? A Jersey.
A teacher asks her students if they're Yankees fans. All of the hands go up except for one student. "Okay, Bobby. What team are you a fan of?" "The Red Sox." "Why's that?" "Well, my parents are both Red Sox fans, so I'm a Red Sox fan too." "That's not a good answer, Bobby. If your parents were both morons, would you be a moron too?" "No, that would make me a Yankees fan!"
Q: How can you tell if a University of Tennessee football player is married? A: There is tobacco spit on both sides of his pickup truck.