Why is it so hot in a stadium after a football game? Because all the fans have left.
Why are football stadiums always cool? "Because they're full of fans."
Chuck Norris can win a football game by spiking a tennis ball over a volleyball net.
Why is someone who borrows money but does not pay it all back like a football player? Because sometimes he gives you a quarter back and sometimes a half back.
Q: What has eight arms and an IQ of 60? A: Four guys drinking Bud Light and watching a football game!