The best god jokes

Yo mama is so fat that when she died jesus couldn't lift her soul to heaven.
has 29.66 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: death, fat, god, heaven, Yo mama
God is one of Chuck Norris's creation.
has 29.66 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, god
Chuck Norris is like an F5 Tornado... When you see him coming you better run for cover and pray to God he doesn't find you...
has 24.25 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, god, religious, weather
What did God say after creating man? I can do so much better.
has 23.03 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: god, men
Q: Why are black peoples nostrils so big? A: Because that's what God held them by when he was painting them.
has 22.94 % from 245 votes. More jokes about: dirty, god
On the ninth day, God said, "Let there be soccer." And it was good. Later on that day, God said, "Let there be one team to rule the others and set the standard for excellence." God said, "Let it be called the Manchester United." Later that day, God said, "Even Man U needs idiots." So HE made their fans.
has 20.19 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: god, soccer, sport
I may be a cold hearted and a unloving bitch, but I'm damn good at it How am I driving? Call 1800-KISS-MY-ASS I'm not an alcholic Alcoholics go to meetings I am a drunk NO FAT CHICKS! Dont laugh at my ride, your daughter may be in it! Horn broke watch for finger I'm not pshycotic, I cant read your mind. Keep staring I might do a trick. Chicks dig my ride. I found Jesus... he was behind the coach the whole time. I didn't sell my soal to satan...... but we did work out a rent to own deal. Dyslexic satan worshipers think they're worshipping Santa. I haven't been the same since that house fell on my sister. Everyone has the right to be stupid but you abuse the privlige. I smile because I have no Idea whats going on. Guys: just because you have one, doesn't mean you have to be one. STOP FOLLOWING ME, I don't know where I'm going.
has 18.49 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, drunk, god, stupid
A blonde walked into her final exam very nervous. But when she received the test, she was relieved to find out that it was a True or False exam. Immediately, she reached into her purse and pulled out a coin. Each time she flipped the coin she would write down an answer. "What are you doing?" the professor asked her. "I'm figuring out the answers," the blonde replied. To this, the professor just rolled his eyes and looked away. When she was done, the professor announced that there were five minutes left to go. "Oh my god!" she said in an excited voice, and started to flip the coin as fast as possible.
has 16.52 % from 102 votes. More jokes about: blonde, god
Why God did made the snake before lawyers? To exercise.
has 15.98 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, god, lawyer
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