Joke #10008

Where did the mooron take the baby cow to eat? To the calf-ateria.
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What happens when the cows refuse to be milked? Udder chaos.
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Why do elephants squirt water through their noses? If they squirted it through their tails, it'd be very difficult to aim.
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What do you call a cow that doesn't give milk? A milk dud.
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What do you call a penguin in the desert? Lost!
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Chuck Norris is the most feared predator on the planet. That's why sharks have a Chuck Norris week.
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An old man approaches the window of a cinema with a chicken on his shoulder, and asks for 2 tickets. The girl at the counter wants to know who is going in with him. He replies, “Well, my pet chicken, of course!” “I’m sorry,” The girl tells him. “We can’t allow animals in the cinema.” The man goes around the corner and stuffs the chicken into his trousers. He returns to the window, buys his ticket and goes in. Inside the cinema, the chicken starts to get hot and begins to squirm, so the man unzips his trousers so the chicken can stick it’s head out and watch the film. Seated next to him is a woman. She looks over at his lap and is horrified. She elbows her friend Agnes and whispers, “Agnes, this man over here has just unzipped his trousers!” Agnes whispers back, “Oh, don’t worry about it… you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all.” Madge says, “I KNOW…but this one’s eating my POPCORN!”
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Why did the tadpole feel lonely? Because he was newt to the area.
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How to catch a polar bear: Go up north and find a frozen lake or pond. Cut a large hole in the ice. Open a can of green peas, and place the peas around the edge of the hole single file. Hide behind a nearby rock. When the bear comes up to take a pea, kick him in the ice-hole!
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Yo' Mama is so fat, after sex, she smokes a turkey.
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A city child came running into the farmhouse. “No wonder that mama pig is so big,” she yelled. “There’s a bunch of little pigs out there blowing her up!”
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