Q. What did the frog say to the fly? A. You are really starting to bug me!
When is a farmer like a magician? When he turns his cow into pasture.
What is the difference between turkey and mother-in-law? There is no difference: both are the best when they are cold on the table.
What do you call a dinosaur with magic powers? Tyrannosaurus Hex.
Q: What do you call a naked deer? A: Buck naked!
Chuck Norris is the reason why This Little Piggy cried wee wee wee all the way home.
Q: Why do beavers spend a fortune on the Internet? A: They never want to log off.
When Chuck Norris walks into a room, the mice jump on chairs.
What kind of noise annoys an oyster? A noisy noise annoys an oyster. (Try saying that fast!)
There was a hysterical call at the fire department, and it went like this: "Help me, please help me! There is a cat meowing and yowling with frequency and urgency. It is going to hurt me, it's going to kill me, can you please help me, and send the fire squad right away?" "Take it easy, cats don’t hurt us, just relax wait until he leaves." "You don’t understand it is going to bite me, it is going to kill me, it is going to be fatal!" "Cats aren’t like snakes or spiders that are poisonous, by the way who is calling?" "I’m Josephine’s parrot you jerk!" "Help me please, please help!"
Q: What did the pig say at the beach on a hot summer's day? A: I'm bakin'.