Joke #10214

What do you get when you cross a bumble bee with a rabbit? A honey bunny.

One day a man goes to a pet shop to buy a parrot. The assistant takes the man to the parrot section and asks the man to choose one. The man asks, "How much is the yellow one?" The assistant says, "$2000." The man is shocked and asks the assistant why it's so expensive. The assistant explains, "This parrot is a very special one. He knows typewriting and can type really fast." "What about the green one?" the man asks. The assistant says, "He costs $5000 because he knows typewriting and can answer incoming telephone calls and takes notes." "What about the red one?" the man asks. The assistant says, "That one's $10,000." The man says, "What does HE do?" The assistant says, "I don't know, but the other two call him boss."

What would you do if your were in a large room, all sealed up, no windows, the door was locked, and there were 5 hungry tigers, 32 vultures, 17 spitting cobras, 213 tarantulas, 1 laywer, and you had a gun with only two bullets? Shoot the lawyer twice.

Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats. Chuck Norris bites the heads off of Siberian Tigers.

Q: Why do Scotsmen wear kilts? A: Sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.

I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.

What's a moo hoo for a darling bull? A dear steer.

Is it just me, or do alligators always look like they are in the middle of a push-up?

How to you know that cows will be in heaven? It's a place of udder delight.

Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says: "Dam"

Look over there! Said the frightened skunk to his pal. "There's a human with a gun, and he's getting closer and closer! What are we going to do?" To which the second skink calmly replied, "Let us spray ."