What do you call a turtle with a hard on?
A slow poke.
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Q: Did you hear the Energizer Bunny Was Arrested?
A: Charged With Battery.
When is the best time to fake an orgasm?
When a rottweiler is humping your leg.
How do you make a rabbit fast?
Don't feed it.
What was the name of the film about a killer lion that swam underwater?
Claws.
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!
What happened to the cannibal lion?
He had to swallow his pride!
Two goldfish are in a tank.
One said to the other: "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Q: Why does the easter bunny hide his eggs?
A: He doesn't want anyone to know he's f**king chickens.
What happened to the man who tried to cross a lioin with a goat?
He had to get a new goat.