What do you get when you cross a frog and a rabbit? A rabbit that says, "Ribbit."
What do you call a cow that fell in a hole? A hole-y Cow.
What happens when you mix a frog with a bathtub scrubby-mit? A rubbit!
What happened to the lizard in the wizard's garden pond? He had him newt-ered.
Jim and Lena were driving around the countryside when they ran over a skunk. "We better take the skunk to the vet, Lena. Just put the skunk between your legs to keep it warm." "But, Jim, what about the smell?" "Don't worry, Lena. The skunk will get used to it."
Why doesn't Sweden export it's cattle? It wants to keep it's Stockholm!
What do you call a cow on a trampoline? A milkshake.
Chuck Norris could stab you with a worm.
Two old men, Abe and Sol, sit on a park bench feeding pigeons and talking about baseball. Abe turns to Sol and asks, "Do you think there's baseball in Heaven?" Sol thinks about it for a minute and replies, "I dunno. But let's make a deal -- if I die first, I'll come back and tell you if there's baseball in Heaven, and if you die first, you do the same." They shake on it and sadly, a few months later, poor Abe passes on. Soon afterward, Sol sits in the park feeding the pigeons by himself and hears a voice whisper, "Sol... Sol... ." Sol responds, "Abe! Is that you?" "Yes it is, Sol," whispers Abe's ghost. Sol, still amazed, asks, "So, is there baseball in Heaven?" "Well," says Abe, "I've got good news and bad news." "Gimme the good news first," says Sol. Abe says, "Well, there is baseball in Heaven." Sol says, "That's great! What news could be bad enough to ruin that?" Abe sighs and whispers, "You're pitching on Friday."
Yo mama is so stupid, when I offered her animal crackers she said no thanks, I'm a vegetarian.
Q: What do you get when you cross a collie with a trumpet? A: A Lassie who plays brassie!