What did Zimbabweans have before candles?
Electricity.
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In the winter of 1926, Thelma Goldstein from Chicago treated herself to her first real vacation in Florida.
Being unfamiliar with the area, she wandered into a restricted hotel in North Miami.
"Excuse me," she said to the manager. "My name is Mrs. Goldstein, and I’d like a small room for two weeks."
"I’m awfully sorry," he replied, "but all of our rooms are occupied."
Just as he said that, a man came down and checked out.
"What luck," said Mrs. Goldstein. "Now there’s a room.
"Not so fast, Madam. I’m sorry, but this hotel is restricted. No Jews allowed."
"Jewish? Who’s Jewish? I happen to be Catholic."
"I find that hard to believe. Let me ask you, who was the Son of God?"
"Jesus, Son of Mary."
"Where was he born?"
"In a stable."
"And why was he born in a stable?"
"Because a schmuck like you wouldn’t let a Jew rent a room in his hotel!"
There's 1000 black guys and 1 white guy.
What do you call the white guy?
Warden.
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Q: What's faster than the speed of light?
A: A jew passing Germany.
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How long does it take a black lady to shit?
About 9 months.
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What do u do when your sitting in the dark and your TV starts to float?
You turn on the lights and shoot the black guy stealing it.
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Q: How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Just Juan.
What do you call a school bus full of black people?
A rotten banana.
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What do you do if you see a black man flopping around on the ground?
Stop laughing and reload.
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A Pakistani boy took admission in an American school...
Teacher: "Whats your name?"
Boy: "Nadir"
Teacher: "No, now you are in America, your name is Johnny from today."
Boy went home and his mother asked: "How was the day Nadir?"
Boy: "I am an American now, so call me Johnny."
Mom and Dad both got offended and beat him up. Next day he was back to school all bruised...
Teacher: "What happened Johnny?"
Boy: "Ma'm, just 6 hours after I became American, I was attacked by two Pakistani terrorists."
Q: What do you use when white people tell you to erase their history?
A: White out.
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