Joke #10466

2PAC once thought he was tougher than Chuck Norris... he was later murdered.
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Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
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Q: Why did Mozart kill all his chickens? A: Because when he asked them who the best composer was, they'd all say: "Bach, Bach, Bach."
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Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris. After 5 days of extreme pain... the snake died.
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Chuck Norris was once shot. The bullet died.
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Three Italian nuns die and go to heaven, where they are met at the Perly Gates by St. Peter. He says, "Ladies, you all led such wonderful lives, that I’m granting you six months to go back to Earth and be anyone you want." The first nun says, "I want-a to be Sophia Loren" and *poof!* she’s gone. The second says, "I want-a to be Madonna" and *poof!* she’s gone. The third says, "I want-a to be Sara Pipalini." St. Peter looks perplexed. "Who?" he says. "Sara Pipalini" replies the nun. St. Peter shakes his head and says "I’m sorry but that name just doesn’t ring a bell." The nun then takes a newspaper out of her habit and hands it to St. Peter. He reads the paper and starts laughing. He hands it back to her and says “No Sister, this says 'Sahara Pipeline laid by 500 men in 7 days!'"
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You might kill two birds with one stone, but Chuck Norris kills two stones with one bird.
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When Chuck Norris crosses the pacific, swimming, sharks hear the "Jaws" music.
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I watched Justin Bieber get shot in CSI and my brother asked "Why are you crying?" I said "Because he didn't die in real life"
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Before they met Chuck Norris, the Black Eyed Peas were simply known as "The Peas."
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