What should you call a bald teddy?
Fred bear .
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What do cows get when they are sick?
Hay Fever.
What kind of shoes do frogs wear?
Open toad!
Where do you find a down-and-out octopus?
On squid row.
What do you get if you cross a bottle of water with an electric eel?
A bit of a shock really.
A guy was walking along the street when he saw a crowd of people running towards him.
He stopped one of the runners and asked, "What’s happening?"
The runner replied breathlessly, "A lion has escaped from the zoo."
"Oh my, which way is it heading?"
"Well you don’t think we are chasing it, do you?"
Law of Pill Rejection
Any pill given to a cat has the potential energy to reach escape velocity.
What do you give a deer with an upset stomach?
Elkaseltzer.
Q: What does a cow make when the sun comes out?
A: A shadow.
One simply cannot play fair and win in a zoo - there are way too many cheetahs.