Joke #10063

What animals do you bring to bed? Your calves.
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal

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What's green with bumps? A frog with the measles!
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The priest in a small Irish village loved the rooster and ten hens he kept in the hen house behind the church. One Sunday morning, before mass, he went to feed the birds and discovered that the cock was missing. He knew about cock fights in the village, so he questioned his parishioners in church. During mass, he asked the congregation, 'Has anybody got a cock?  All the men stood up. 'No, no,' he said, 'that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock?'  All the women stood up.  'No, no,' he said, 'that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock that doesn' t belong to them?'  Half the women stood up.  'No, no,' he said, 'that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen MY cock?'  Sixteen altar boys, two priests and a goat stood up. The priest fainted.
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has 83.54 % from 647 votes. More jokes about: animal, church, priest, sex, time
How do you weigh a whale? On Whale Weigh Scales.
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has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris can stick his hand inside a rabbit's mouth and pull out a HAT!
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
How is cat food sold? Usually purr can!
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has 29.01 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: animal
Kangaroo 911: "What's your emergency?" Kangaroo: "I can't find my children" Kangaroo 911: "Did you check your pockets?" Kangaroo: "Oh nevermind."
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has 56.05 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, customer service, kids
Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats. Chuck Norris bites the heads off of Siberian Tigers.
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has 58.26 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, disgusting, morbid, music
How far can a rabbit run into the woods? Halfway. After that she's running out of the woods.
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has 44.50 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: How many sheep do you need to make a sweater? A: I don’t know. I didn’t think sheep could knit!
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has 45.52 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Why does a squirrle swim on its back? A: To keep its nuts dry
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has 40.61 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty