How does a leopard change its spots?
When it gets tired of one spot it just moves to another.
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What do you call a smart blonde?
A Golden Retriever.
Yesterday my daughter was playing in the garden when I saw her kill a butterfly.
So to teach her a lesson I said, "Just for that you don't get any butter for a month."
Today in the kitchen she killed a cockroach. I said, "Nice try."
A man sat at a local bar and said, "This is a special day, I'm celebrating."
"What a coincidence," said the woman next to him.
I'm celebrating, too" she replied, clinking glasses with him.
"What are your celebrating?"
"I'm a chicken farmer, and for years all my hens were infertile, but today they're finally fertile."
"What a coincidence, the woman said.
For my husband and I have been trying to have a child.
Today, my gynecologist told me I'm pregnant! How did your chickens become fertile?" she asked.
"I switched cocks," he replied.
"What a coincidence," she said.
Q: Why do gorillas have big noses?
A: Because they have big fingers!
How did that bullfight come out?
Oh, it was a toss-up.
Q: Why can't the bankrupt cowboy complain?
A: He has got no beef.
Chuck Norris can mess with the bull without getting the horns.
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A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family.
She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?"
The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."
What’s the difference between a pigeon and a nigger?
The pigeon is white and the nigger can’t fly!
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