Joke #10529

What flies around your light at night and can bite off your head? A tiger moth.
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal

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"Mommy, all the kids at school say I'm a werewolf! Is that true?" "No, of course not. Now shut up and comb your face."
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has 43.61 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: animal, school
A man went to visit a friend and was amazed to find him playing chess with his dog. He watched the game in astonishment for a while. “I can hardly believe my eyes!” he exclaimed. That’s the smartest dog I’ve ever seen.” “Nah, he’s not so smart,” the friend replied. I’ve beaten him three games out of five."
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has 78.47 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris invented the Giraffe when he roundhouse kicked a spotted Horse in the chin.
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has 57.35 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
We must admit that we want to be like some animals. We all want to be strong like a bear, we want to have a sharp sight like a falcon, the intelligence like an owl, the endurance like a horse, we want to sing like a skylark, we want to be running like a fox and of course we all want to have the salivas like a dragon lizard.
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has 51.00 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, horse, life
A blind man with an assistance dog was getting ready to cross the street. When the dog took him across he almost got ran over by the traffic and the cars where sliding everywhere to avoid hitting him. When he got to the other side, he took out a treat to give to the dog. A spectator who saw what happened couldn't believe his eyes. He ran over to the blind man and said, "Sir, why are you rewarding that dog, he almost got you killed?" The blind man replied, "I'm trying to find his head so I can kick his ass!"
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has 75.77 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: animal
Little lad is sitting between his Mum and Dad on the sofa and they are playing a game about what sounds animals say. His Mum says "What does a duck say Tommy?" He says"Quack quack Mummy." His Mum says "Very good Tommy,that's right." She says "What does a dog say?" He says "Woof woof Mummy." She says "Very good." She says "What does a cat say?" He says "Meow meow Mummy." She says "Yes that's right." Tommy says "Let Daddy have a go." His dad says "Ok Tommy,what does a cow say?" The little lad looks confused and his Dad says "Come on Tommy you know what a cow says." Tommy says "Yes I do but do you mean a cow that eats grass and gives us our milk, or the one you where talking to Uncle John about, that said you could'nt go to the Stag show with him?"
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has 66.77 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: animal, family, game, insulting
Why did the rabbit have trouble hopping? Because he always kept one foot in his pocket for good luck.
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has 62.61 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal
How about we spank each other and call ourselves even?
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has 15.98 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: animal
"My friend is nuts. He thinks he's Bugs Bunny. But I m positive he isn't." "How do you know he isn t?" "Because I am."
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has 59.93 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you call fish poop? BassTurds!
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has 29.93 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal, fish