How about we spank each other and call ourselves even?
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A man climbed over a fence into a field to pick some flowers.
He noticed a bull nearby.
Say, farmer "Is that bull safe?"
"Well, he's a lot safer than you are right now!"
What kind of whale flies?
Pilot whales.
Q: What animal has the most kids.
A: A sperm whale.
Local mountain lions have been complaining about the recent string of Chuck Norris attacks.
Two skunks were being chased by a bear.
As the bear got closer, one of the skunks said "Whatever shall we do?"
"Let us spray!" replied the other.
Q: Why does a squirrle swim on its back?
A: To keep its nuts dry
Two deer walk out of a gay bar, one turns to the other and says, "I can't believe I blew twenty bucks in there..."
It's a really hot day and this penguin is having car trouble, so he takes it into a garage.
The penguin asks, "How long will it be?"
The mechanic says, "Just a few minutes."
So the penguin decides to go get an ice cream at the grocery store across the street.
When the penguin gets there he climbs inside the big freezer door and starts to eat ice cream.
Three hours go by before the penguin looks at his watch and jumps out of the freezer and races back to the garage.
With ice cream all over his face and his stomach he says, "So, how's my car?"
The mechanic comes walking out wiping his hands on a rag and says, "Looks like you blew a seal."
The penguin says, "No, no, no, I was just eating ice cream."
Q: What do you call a cow playing with its self?
A: Beef stroganoff.
What's green green green green green?
A frog rolling down a hill.