Joke #10545

If a four-legged animal is a quadruped and a two-legged animal is a biped. What's a tiger? A stri-ped.
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has 48.26 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal

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What kind of tiles can't you stick on walls? Reptiles.
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A man was robbing a house in the middle of the night. All of a sudden, he heard a parrot cry out. "Jesus is gonna get you." The robber ignored it, and takes the TV. Again, the parrot cries out. "Jesus is gonna get you." The robber started to get a little worried. "What's your name, birdie?" "Moses." "What dumbass named you Moses?" "The same dumbass who called his rottweiler Jesus."
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What animals do you bring to bed? Your calves.
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In what state will you find the most cows? Moo York.
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has 34.72 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, geography
Little girl: "Why does your son say, 'Cluck, cluck, cluck?'" Mother: "Because he thinks he's a chicken." Little girl: "Why don't you tell him he's not a chicken?" Mother: "Because we need the eggs."
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has 43.40 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: animal, baby, family, food, kids
Whats the difference in a seagull and a babys diaper? A seagull flits across the shore and a baby shits across the floor.
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has 63.75 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: animal, baby
Q: Why did Mozart kill all his chickens? A: Because when he asked them who the best composer was, they'd all say: "Bach, Bach, Bach."
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has 83.94 % from 174 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, music
What do you call an owl magician? HOOOOOdini.
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has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: animal
How are black people and wolves similar? They both fight in packs.
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has 69.73 % from 116 votes. More jokes about: animal, black people, racist
In Noah’s ark, on day 3 the animals could no longer hold their sexual desire, so they started having sex with one another. But Noah got really angry cause the Ark started shaking dangerously and he decided that it was time to put things in order. So he ordered that every male should get a card stating the name of his wife and the days they were allowed to mate. So they did… After a couple of days, during breakfast in the Ark’s cafeteria the monkey said to his wife: "You’ d better get ready ‘cause next Tuesday you’ll suffer cruelly!" The female monkey felt really ashamed because all of the animals heard her husband… The day after, the male monkey said to his wife again: "You’ d better get ready ‘cause next Tuesday you’ll suffer cruelly!" The female monkey feeling really confused, told Noah what had happened, so Noah called the male monkey in his office and asked for an explanation. “You kinky monkey! Why do you insist on disgracing your wife in front of all the other animals?” said Noah “I am not kinky sir”, said the monkey “I’m just warning her because I lost my card at a poker game and now the elephant has it…”
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has 76.69 % from 133 votes. More jokes about: animal, elephant, sex, wife