If a four-legged animal is a quadruped and a two-legged animal is a biped.
What's a tiger?
A stri-ped.
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How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight?
Have YOU ever seen a rabbit with glasses?
You know Chuck Norris' pet lizard, right?
Last I heard, he was in the movie "Godzilla".
Oh, and his pet turtle starred in "Gamera" as well.
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What goes black white black white...?
A penguin rolling down a hill!
What's black and white and laughing?
The penguin who pushed him!
Q: What's worse than having termites in your piano?
A: Crabs on your organ.
Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks.
The first blonde said, “Those are deer tracks.”
The second blonde said, “No those are elk tracks.”
The third blonde said, “You’re both wrong, those are moose tracks.”
The blondes were still arguing when the train hit them.
Emma: So, what kind of tracks were they?
Two snakes were crawling along when one snake asked the other, "Are we poisonous?"
The other replied, "You're darn right we are! We're rattlesnakes. Why do you ask?"
To which the first replied, "Because I just bit my tongue"
Chuck Norris once rode a bull, and nine months later it had a calf.
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If you had fifteen cows and five goats what would you have?
Plenty of milk.
When Chuck Norris was a baby he didnt have teddy bears.
He had real bears.
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Chuck Norris can make a turtle go faster.
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