Joke #10605

What is the feeling that you've smelled a certain skunk before? Deja phew.
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has 46.20 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal

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Where did the bull carry his stock-market report? In his beef case.
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has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Why did the atheist throw her watch out the window? A: She wanted to see if it was designed intelligently enough to evolve into a bird.
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has 32.12 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: animal, atheist
A boy at a cinema notices what looks like a bear sitting next to him "Are you a bear?" "Yes" "What are you doing at the movies?" "Well, I liked the book!"
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has 71.85 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal
What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk? An udder failure.
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has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
Two old men, Abe and Sol, sit on a park bench feeding pigeons and talking about baseball. Abe turns to Sol and asks, "Do you think there's baseball in Heaven?" Sol thinks about it for a minute and replies, "I dunno. But let's make a deal -- if I die first, I'll come back and tell you if there's baseball in Heaven, and if you die first, you do the same." They shake on it and sadly, a few months later, poor Abe passes on. Soon afterward, Sol sits in the park feeding the pigeons by himself and hears a voice whisper, "Sol... Sol... ." Sol responds, "Abe! Is that you?" "Yes it is, Sol," whispers Abe's ghost. Sol, still amazed, asks, "So, is there baseball in Heaven?" "Well," says Abe, "I've got good news and bad news." "Gimme the good news first," says Sol. Abe says, "Well, there is baseball in Heaven." Sol says, "That's great! What news could be bad enough to ruin that?" Abe sighs and whispers, "You're pitching on Friday."
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has 85.37 % from 491 votes. More jokes about: animal, black humor, heaven, sport
Q: What is the difference between an alligator and a crocodile? A: One says "See you later" and the other says "In a while".
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has 52.38 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, time
Q: What do squirrels give for Valentine's Day? A: Forget-me-nuts.
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has 60.15 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, Valentines day
A mother was teaching his child about the side-effects of alcohol. She gets two short glasses, filling one with water and the other with whiskey. She says "I want you to see this." She puts a worm in the water, and it swims around. She puts a worm in the whiskey, and the worm dies immediately. She then says, feeling that she has made her point clear, "what do you have to say about this experiment?" The child responds by saying: "If I drink whiskey, I won't get worms!"
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has 83.19 % from 1153 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, death, kids
Teacher: Kids,what does the chicken give you? Kids: Meat! Teacher: Very good! Now what does the pig give you? Kids: Bacon! Teacher: Great! And what does the fat cow give you? Kid: Homework!
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has 83.65 % from 248 votes. More jokes about: animal, food, kids, teacher
What would you do if your were in a large room, all sealed up, no windows, the door was locked, and there were 5 hungry tigers, 32 vultures, 17 spitting cobras, 213 tarantulas, 1 laywer, and you had a gun with only two bullets? Shoot the lawyer twice.
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has 58.56 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: animal, lawyer