Joke #10879

In 1945 Chuck Norris drank a Redbull and jumped out a plane. For image results, Google the word Hiroshima.
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has 70.07 % from 83 votes. More jokes about: airplane, Chuck Norris, technology, time

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Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris. After 5 days of extreme pain... the snake died.
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has 85.37 % from 670 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death, time
On some air bases the Air Force is on one side of the field and civilian aircraft use the other side of the field, with the control tower in the middle. One day the tower received a call from an aircraft asking, "What time is it?" The tower responded, "Who is calling?" The aircraft replied, "What difference does it make?" The tower replied, "It makes a lot of difference. If it is an American Airlines flight, it is 3 o'clock. If it is an Air Force plane, it is 1500 hours. If it is a Navy aircraft, it is 6 bells. If it is an Army aircraft, the big hand is on the 12 and the little hand is on the 3. If it is a Marine Corps aircraft, it's Thursday afternoon."
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has 85.31 % from 238 votes. More jokes about: air force, airplane, military, navy, time
Once chuck norris and time had race. Result: The time is still running.
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has 84.58 % from 670 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, time
My skydiving instructor would always take the time to answer any of our stupid first-timer questions. One guy asked, "If our chute doesn't open, and the reserve doesn't open, how long do we have until we hit the ground?" Our jump master looked at him and in perfect deadpan and answered, "The rest of your life."
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has 84.45 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: airplane, black humor, life, time
One day a man, who had been stranded on a desert island for over ten years sees an unusual speck on the horizon. "It's certainly not a ship", he thinks to himself. As the speck gets closer and closer he begins to rule out the possibilities of a small boat, then even a raft. Suddenly, emerging from the surf, comes a drop dead gorgeous blonde woman wearing a wet suit and scuba gear. She approaches the stunned guy and says: "Tell me, how long has it been since you've had a cigarette?" "Ten years," replies the stunned man. With that she reaches over and unzips a waterproof pocket on her left sleeve and pulls out a pack of cigarettes. He takes one, lights it, takes a long drag and says: "Man, oh man! Is that good!" "And how long has it been since you've had a sip of bourbon?" she asks him. Trembling the castaway replies: "Ten years." She reaches over, unzips her right sleeve, pulls out a flask and hands it to him. He opens the flask, takes a long swig and says: "WOW, that's absolutely fantastic!" At this point she starts slowly unzipping the long zipper that runs down the front of her wet suit, looks at the man seductively, and asks: "And how long has it been since you've had some real fun?" With tears in his eyes, the guy falls to his knees and sobs: "Oh good Lord! Don't tell me you've got a laptop?"
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has 84.34 % from 118 votes. More jokes about: blonde, desert island, technology, time
Chuck Norris is the only weapon allowed through airport security
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has 83.95 % from 115 votes. More jokes about: airplane, Chuck Norris
Once Chuck Norris went back in time and kicked a ball. When it landed it wiped out the dinosaurs.
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has 83.88 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, dinosaur, time, travel
If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Chuck Norris?" It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance."
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has 83.76 % from 529 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, technology
Chuck Norris can fold airplanes into paper.
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has 83.62 % from 282 votes. More jokes about: airplane, Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom.
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has 82.75 % from 287 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, time, travel