Joke #10879

In 1945 Chuck Norris drank a Redbull and jumped out a plane. For image results, Google the word Hiroshima.
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Chuck Norris can fold airplanes into paper.
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On some air bases the Air Force is on one side of the field and civilian aircraft use the other side of the field, with the control tower in the middle. One day the tower received a call from an aircraft asking, "What time is it?" The tower responded, "Who is calling?" The aircraft replied, "What difference does it make?" The tower replied, "It makes a lot of difference. If it is an American Airlines flight, it is 3 o'clock. If it is an Air Force plane, it is 1500 hours. If it is a Navy aircraft, it is 6 bells. If it is an Army aircraft, the big hand is on the 12 and the little hand is on the 3. If it is a Marine Corps aircraft, it's Thursday afternoon."
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Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom.
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If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Chuck Norris?" It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance."
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Once chuck norris and time had race. Result: The time is still running.
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Sundials tell the time according to the position of Chuck Norris.
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Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
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It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
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This lady is on an airplane and is seated next to a man named Ian McKegney. About half an hour after they take off, Ian sneezed. He calmly opened his fly, took out his penis and wiped it with a handkerchief. The lady was shocked but a little too shy to say anything. About 15 minutes later, Ian sneezed again and then once more opened his fly, grabbed his penis and wiped it off. The lady could not beleive it, and being to shy to mention it, she thought to herself, "If he does that again, I'm definitely going to mention it." Well, guess what? About 10 minutes later, Ian sneezed again and proceeded as before. She turned to Ian and said, "That is disgusting! Must you do that in front of me?" Ian apologized and explained that it was a medical condition, "Every time I sneeze, I have an orgasm," he explained. "Really, what do you take for that?" she asked. Ian replied, "Pepper."
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Chuck Norris went an hour without killing... just to kill some time.
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