Don't trust atoms, they make up everything.
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The chemical formula for the highly toxic cyanide ion is CN-.
These are also Chuck Norris' initials.
This is not a coincidence.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
Q: What happens when spectroscopists are idle?
A: They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
Q: What element is a girl's future best friend?
A: Carbon.
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Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A: If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium.
Yo mama farts so much there is a reason why Jupiter is made out of gas.
Q: Why can't lawyers do NMR?
A: Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
Q: Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
A: They're cheaper than day rates.
