Q: Why should Democrats be buried 100 feet deep? A: Because deep down, they're really good people.
A Liberal died and a friend went around collecting for a fund for his funeral. A woman was asked to donate ten dollars. "Ten dollars?" she said. "It only takes ten dollars to bury a Liberal? Here's a hundred - go bury 10 of them!"
Someone going to work sees a crowd of people walking. Looking at the beginning of course, he sees a coffin behind a gentleman with a little dog followed by the crowd. Approaching the owner and he asks him: "What happened here, man?" "Pff, my mother-in-law died," he said. "Hush how sad eh… And, if allowed, how?" "My dog bit her…" "You don't tell me! Could you lend him to me just for tonight?" "Get in line!"
A true meaning of the word DEMOCRATS: Dangerous Excessive Member Of Crazy Rats
If you want to commit suicide, all you need to do is say,"Chuck Norris is a loser."
When a Jedi dies they become part of the force, when the force dies it becomes part of Chuck Norris.
After my wife died, I couldn't even look at another woman for 10 years. But now that I'm out of jail, I can honestly say it was worth it!
Q: What's the difference between Elvis and a smart Liberal? A: Elvis has been sighted.
In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself
Q: When do Democrats like the idea of a flat tax? A: After it reaches 95%