Q: Why should Democrats be buried 100 feet deep?
A: Because deep down, they're really good people.
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A Liberal died and a friend went around collecting for a fund for his funeral.
A woman was asked to donate ten dollars.
"Ten dollars?" she said.
"It only takes ten dollars to bury a Liberal? Here's a hundred - go bury 10 of them!"
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The original CBS Survivor series was filmed in Chuck's mansion.
No episode aired, as no one survived.
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Q: What happens when you cross a pig with a Democrat?
A: Nothing. There are some things a pig won't do.
What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead nigga in the road?
The dead dog has skid marks in front of it.
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Q: What is foreplay for a Liberal?
A: Thirty minutes of begging.
When Chuck Norris pokes you on Facebook, you die.
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"Dad, I don't want to go to school today." said the boy.
"Why not, son?"
"Well, one of the chickens on the school farm died last week and we had chicken soup for lunch the next day. Then three days ago one of the pigs died and we had roast pork the next day."
"But why don't you want to go today?"
"Because our English teacher died yesterday!"
Q: When do Democrats like the idea of a flat tax?
A: After it reaches 95%
Yo mama's so stupid she tried comiting suicide by jumping of a tall building but got lost on the way down.