Q: Why did a person with an unspayed female cat have to go to court?
A: For kitty littering.
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Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray this cushy life to keep.
I pray for toys that look like mice,
And sofa cushions, soft and nice.
I pray for gourmet kitty snacks,
And someone nice to scratch my back,
For windowsills all warm and bright,
For shadows to explore at night.
I pray I'll always stay real cool
And keep the secret feline rule
To never tell a human that
The world is really ruled by cats!
Q: Who was the first cat to fly in an airplane?
A: Kitty-hawk
Q: Why did the silly kid try to feed pennies to the cat?
A: Because his mother told him to put money in the kitty.
What's the difference between an old cat and a baby kitten?
An old cat scratches and bites but a little pussy never hurt anybody!
Little Mathieu was digging in his garden a hole.
The next door neighbor saw him and asked;
"Why are you digging the dirt Mathieu?"
"My goldfish died, and I have to bury it."
"Oh, I’m so sorry! But, isn’t that hole too big for a small goldfish?"
"Indeed, it is! But my goldfish is inside your stupid cat!"
Bears do not eat bears.
Tigers do not eat tigers.
Dogs do not eat dogs.
Cats stopped eating kebabs.
The old man had died.
A wonderful funeral was in progress and the country preacher talked at length of the good traits of the deceased, what an honest man he was, and what a loving husband and kind father he was.
Finally, the widow leaned over and whispered to one of her children, "Go up there and take a look in the coffin and make sure that's your pa in there."
If you throw a kitten out of a moving car, would it be considered kitty litter?
Vote:
If Chuck Norris were a cat he would have ten lives.
Vote:
Go to your back door and look for the dog.
If the dog is at the door and he is wet, it's probably raining.
But if the dog is standing there really soaking wet, it is probably raining really hard.
If the dog's fur looks like it's been rubbed the wrong way, it's probably windy.
If the dog has snow on his back, it's probably snowing.
Of course, to be able to tell the weather like this, you have to leave the dog outside all the time, especially if you expect bad weather.
Yours sincerely,
The CAT
