Joke #11570

Q: What do birds give out on Halloween? A: Tweets!
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Only Chuck Norris can dislike on Facebook.
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A guy tells his friends: The girl I was dating broke my heart, so I broke her Apple iPhone 5. You all know who cried more
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The saying "Kill two birds with one stone" actually came from when chuck Norris downed two Peregrin Falcons with one roundhouse kick.
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Chuck Norris logged on MSN through the display of washing machines.
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On Halloween, children give Chuck Norris candy.
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Did you hear about the wild party at the haunted house? The whole vibe was anything ghost.
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Q: How do you know your doctor is a vampire? A: He draws your blood from your neck with a straw!
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Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
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Michael: "What treat do eye doctors give out on Halloween?" Matthew: "I don't know. What?" Michael: "Candy corneas."
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My grandfather once told me "your generation is too reliant on technology." So I replied "no, your generation is too reliant on technology!" Then I disconnected his life support.
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