Q: How did the pirate become a boxing champion so fast? A: Nobody was ready to take on his right hook.
The way from the cabins to the ring is too long, says the boxer. No worries, on your way back you will come back with the stretcher...
Chuck Norris once shook a pirates hand. That pirate is now known as Captain Hook
Yo' Mama is so flat, pirates can't wait to get their hands her a sunken chest.
There once was pirate captain who, whenever it looked like a battle would be imminent would change into a red shirt. After observing this behavior for a few months, one of the crew members asked him what it meant. "It's in case I get shot. I don't want you crew members to see blood and freak out." "That's very sensible, sir." At that moment, the crew member spotted eight hostile ships on the horizon. The captain all of a sudden looked very concerned. "Get my brown pants."
Why are black people so good at Basketball? Cause all you have to do is RUN, SHOOT and STEAL.
After a particularly poor game of golf, a popular club member skipped the clubhouse and started to go home. As he was walking to the parking lot to get his car, a policeman stopped him and asked, "Did you tee off on the sixteenth hole about twenty minutes ago?" "Yes," the golfer responded. "Did you happen to hook your ball so that it went over the trees and off the course?" "Yes, I did. How did you know?" he asked. "Well," said the policeman very seriously, "Your ball flew out onto the highway and crashed through a driver's windshield. The car went out of control, crashing into five other cars and a fire truck. The fire truck couldn't make it to the fire, and the building burned down. So, what are you going to do about it?" The golfer thought it over carefully and responded... "I think I'll close my stance a little bit, tighten my grip and lower my right thumb."
Q: What do pirates wear in the winter? A: Long Johns!
Q: How did the pirate get through School? A: By sailing on high C's.
Q: What's a pirate's favorite letter? A: You would think R but it is the C that love.